A mountain rose, soft and velvet crimson.
A low fog drifts down from the mountain's peak,
And a still wind strips the rose
Of its prized petals.
Two petals flee together,
Along a shared path,
Floating gently in the mist.
No one to watch their flight,
Yet their beauty holds true.
The breeze takes them down mountain slope,
On through forest glades,
Through the trees which lend their golden leaves
To join the petals dance through the air.
The leaves take their own paths now,
As the petal continue their play.
They break through mist,
As well the end of trees.
They now softly glide,
And end on glassy wake.
Moonlight now caresses them into dreams,
As the water rocks them to sleep.
Author notes
this was kinda just a random image that i had floating through my head so let me know what you thought of it and what you interpreted the meaning to be
A contest entry
- I want too read ANYTHING & EVERYTHING! ENTER! ENTER!ENTER! by Sheilasbabygal4life.
545 points, ended October 31, 238 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 16 of 16
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This was a really descriptive piece you have here. It was like I was there. I really enjoyed reading this. Thanks for entering and best of luck too you in the contest.
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9pts...
Thank you for this wonderful contribution to The Poetic Bandits reading list
~Lilac
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The ending of this was magnificent... I loved how it just softly rocks to a halt... I really love the imagery in this poem... I didn't see the picture that this was inspired by, but the picture it left in my mind was amazing... thank you for sharing
Keep writing
Polly -
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in all honesty it wasnt really inspired by a picture i just had the random image of roses flying in the mist and landing on a moonlight lake so i found a contest to enter into and wrote it down thanks for the comment
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What a magnificent write
Beautiful lines:
"The breeze takes them down the mountain slope,
On through the forest glades,
Through the trees which lend their golden leaves
To join the petals dance through the air."
LISA
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Grandstand imagery a lovely flow making this a great read ...
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This is a serene image that you have painted with words.
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Beautiful imagery my fellow poet. I really loved this piece. I could feel myself watching the petal as it fell to the ground. Great work and good luck in the contest.
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You have set a very pretty scene as they drift to be caressesd by the moonlight and rocked to sleep by the warers.
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Such sweet thoughts expressed in these lines - lovely visuals throughout the poem as well. Easy to read and understand
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its awesome. i really liked it. and its somewhat happy in its own way.
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this is lovely. Filled with tender images that can be easily seen. In line eight however, you use the word there and I think it should be their ... ?
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You paint a lovely picture with your words in this piece. Your imagery is vivid, and the phrasing you've used sets your words to their maximum effectiveness. Some of your punctuation, like the periods in places, kinda jar the flow a bit, but that's the only thing I noticed. Good work!
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Woww.
great flow,great imagery, great everything.
You,like i always tell you, are an amazing writer.
I love all your poetry,keep writing.
..Simply Me♥ -
I like it. the flow fits well with the poem and the imagery was great
btw
thanx for the points the contest is now up and running would you like to help judge when the time comes?
May the stars always light your path.
DW
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