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Hand Written Apologies

She found a letter on her doorstep.
And on the front of the envelope
Was her name written in sloppy cursive.

And on the inside
On that crinkled piece of paper
Were these words.


“Dear You,
I’m sorry for every thing I’ve put you through.
I apologize for every lie.
For ever tear you’ve shed that I caused.
That I wasn’t there when you needed me.
When I told you I loved you && then said I didn’t mean it.
                            [[When I did.]]
Baby, What do I have to do
To get you to see that I’m sorry??

I’ll always love you
Please don’t forget me in your yesterdays.

Love,

Me”


Before she was done with the last words written
It was stained with her mascara tears.
As she put out her cigarette
&& got off the couch
She reached for the phone to dial his number
Only to realize
She.
Had.
Already.
Forgotten.
Him.
&&.
His.
Handwritten.
Apology.

A contest entry

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Comments

  • Eusebius
    November 21, 2008

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    A very interesting take on an old and well known subject... I would say,unique, in fact, and very expertly done! I loved it a ton! bravo!


  • Darkness-My Home
    November 21, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    This was so sweet and sad. The imagery and flow is great! And "Stained with her mascara tears" really adds to the feeling! Keep writing!
    Lillie


  • Timeless Wisdom silver member
    November 21, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Very emotional...

    Good points: I love the emotion and imagery flowing through this. I also like the fact of it being in a letter format...it really gives it the boost of a "handwritten apology". I dont think apologies should be handwritten, because if you really mean it, you would be gutsy enough to say it face to face.

    Bad Points: There is only one thing I saw that looked kind of awckward. The Line : "It was stained with her mascara tears." Doesn't seem to go with the natural flow of the poem..this line sort of lacks a certain structure. I would like to encourage you to rephrase it with something like this "Now wet from her mascara stained tears" ...just a suggestion.

    And in the words of the almighty me Pick up your pen and never put it down

    ASM
    AKA Raymond

  • HiddenxSecrets
    January 7, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Nicely written. The emotion just drips off your words. I loved the ending, summed it up perfectly. Also, the ending is bitter, and blunt. Well done and keep up the nice work. I'm going to add you to my favourites.

    HxS