Crimson ventricles,
wrapped in shadowed chambers,
trace the rhythmic movement
of pale candlelight across the room
Pulsating with promise,
not unlike a ravenous beast
hiding in the darkness,
waiting for desires bounty
to reveal itself from seclusion
Beats with erratic tempo,
as if mimicking the the wind,
with its fickle ebb and flow
through lawn and lea
Abides the whimsical fancies of man,
despite all the convolution,
indignation and consternation
that coincides
Mesmerised servant to all
fool hardy misconceptions,
of callow and unrelenting,
would be Casanovas
And when its mask is stripped from view,
its raw and intangible beauty,
is unfurled to all those whom perchance
to behold such wondrous aura
Follow the light that emanates
from its enchanted seed,
dance its tune to fated glory,
as though one was whisked away
in whispered plumes of incense
Dream of all this and more,
then you will know the difference
between fact and fable,
when destiny blooms before you,
in its palpitating crimson core.
Author notes
prompt: ~use poetic devices (show me your heart)
A contest entry
- What is your heart? by tara wilson.
1000 points, ended December 26, 2007, 36 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Detailed critique welcome
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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some people dont see pure talent, anymore...
*sigh*
I loved it, dad
it painted a beautiful picture for me
and it was... lovely
dont listen to their critical observations.. I found it quite enjoyable.. :-*
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I find too many adjectives in this poem, they are very distracting for me to understand what the poem is about...some are okay, however, I am lost when reading this poem, I find it a little too 'wordy'..but that is only my preference..thanks so much for entering my contest...
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A man with words that stold my heart. This is gorgeous.
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thank you, I am glad you like this one.
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This is beautiful!
It makes me want to take a journey through your heart...So lovely the imagery and language as well as alliteration...
This is amazing, Cuz
Lynda
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Thanks Lynda, I don't know how I keep managing to write something you find amazing. I am glad you enjoyed the journey though my words.
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I love this verse...
"And when its mask is stripped from view,
its raw and intangible beauty,
is unfurled to all those whom perchance
to behold such wondrous aura"
Well Done, Poet!
~ Nicky♥
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Thank you for the wonderful comment, it gives me pleasure to know that others enjoy my work.
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