Majestic pyramids, flowing streams,
A world built entirely of dreams.
Would we not stay up at night,
To view God's heavenly sight.
The universe is all around us,
Though it sometimes confounds us.
Just let me look, and breathe the air,
Of a world ambivalent but still fair.
Rescue me Lord from this ground,
turn me up and spin me around.
Author notes
Such a beautiful night.
In a list
A contest entry
- Quikie PIF the prompt is the picture by esroddo.
450 points, ended December 3, 2007, 8 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 9 of 9
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Great write here
If only we could turn the hate inside out and find we are all having problems today so how could we help each other instead of hurt .
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A beautiful view of the cosmos. I enjoyed the vocabulary you employed and the flow of the piece. If I may make one suggestion, I would change one thing:
"The universe is all around us,
Though it sometimes confounds us."
I would change to:
"The universe is all around us,
Though at times it does confound us."
That is a personal thought however, and I still enjoyed the poem immensely. Be careful on the roads by day, and keep writing hope by night.
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Okay honey don't get eady to leave us to soon.....smile you are loved by me......novy
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Like a Dream...Brazos
very soft and lovely imagery here. Thanks for sharing and congratulations on SILVER. Well done
Lady
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oh wow! I can understand why you won silver on this one, it's just amazing. I'm definitely bookmarking! I think you actually managed to describe the beaty, the feel and the epic way of the universe. It's just a calm night where you suddenly sees everything.
It's simply amazing, I'm in love with this piece!
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the day shall come when all us believers are acought up in the rapture
Joe
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Beautiful like a wonderful dream
I really love the verses and words you used. I could feel the wonderful passion in your poem in a spiritual way. Thank you for the grand entry and good luck
LISA
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i love this honey it spoke of the true passion for god and i love that i thik its a fighter in the contest
muah i fucken love you'
jewels
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This totally a beautifyl write, its very spiritual and your words touch my heart husband.....I hope you win this one...novy
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