all the earth is saffron
to her lips,
for an ocean once parted has reversed
that miracle,
its water parting flesh- dividing sisters
from common soil,
each grain now too heavy between them
to bear its own weight, sodden
and empty.
In a list
A contest entry
- After the Storm by Rowan.
2500 points, ended December 14, 2007, 15 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think (Critical Honesty Appreciated)
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
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yes. Thanks kate, you never disappoint me. I love the first line.
Excellent entry.
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You amaze me at your use of brevity to impact the reader. This poem makes me want to wail. There is moaning in the voice of your pen poet. The mourning of a "sodden" happenstance such as this squeals in pain. This is excellent. It is truly a sad rendering of feelings but very well scribed. Exquisite without verbosity. I felt these words. I wish you the very best in this comp lady poet.
Much Love & Blessed Holidays to You & Yours ♥
Renee
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I saw the contest picture two days ago and I think you've illustrated the emotion with such preciseness the picture wishes to convey. I can actually feel the weight and emptiness in this one. Very well done. Cheers!
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god yes..... i feel this one kate, right to the core of it all
sodden... such an apt word....
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