Echoes of conscious thought
like whispered breath
into winds of trepidation
Ink traces its shadows
in a dance of perceptive emotion
onto unwitting parchment
Subliminal dreams spill
their silent wonder
to inner enlightened eye
Fanciful visions invade
all conceptions of reality
and stir the poets cortex
Words flow like streams
through unkempt forests
from quill to paper
They weave their dance
of enigma or angst
whatever the occasion prevails
Tales that churn through unknown minds
revealing to each their own conclusions
is the air that fills a poets sails.
Author notes
Poetry is an echo, asking a shadow to dance
~ Carl Sandburg
A contest entry
- Dripping Ink...A 12 hr contest... by poet2angels.
475 points, ended November 30, 2007, 11 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - INVITE ONLY...FOR MY FAVORITES OR ANYONE WHO H AS ME ON THEIR FAVORITE'S... BEFORE TODAY by mysticstorm.
600 points, ended December 8, 2007, 14 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Favorites - Your best Prewrites by Cupcrazy.
1000 points, ended January 17, 2008, 31 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Echo - Prewrites Welcome by Danna Hobart.
400 points, ended January 4, 25 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Detailed critique welcome
Comments
1 - 12 of 12
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Oh My~
Wow ~ You know when I read this- I kept getting that feeling- You wanted to say more- if there was opportunity to speak- and shed more skin...You would...I don't know why I kept getting that...which is a good thing because sometimes a contest limits the lines or like me... I could write and write instilling more images because there is more to say...but don't want to traumatize the reader with bloodshot eyes
I keep seeing like empty space after the last line-....to be continued type of feeling...
Speaking of the last line
fill the poet's sails....
I was envisioning a scene from Lord of the Rings...
and the song: Sailing by Christopher Cross
You sure have me looking over the horizon my Friend with this one
Congratulations on Your HM's~
Well Done!!!
Bravo!!
Woot
Thank You for sharing Your Talent
Best wishes in all You do
with love & light~ Desire~*~
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I am so pleased this piece stirred up so many different thoughts, the aim of this was to encourage contemplation and hopefully inspiration. the closing line is aimed at the feeling we get as an author when feedback shows us how successful the piece has been, by being interpreted in more ways than we initially conceived.
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I always liked that Sanburg quote you based this poem on. Thank you very much for entering my contest.
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amazing.
i feel like there is a word missing or something in the first lines of the poem:
"Echoes of conscious thought
like whispered breath
into winds of trepidation"
--only you know where you were intending it to go, but it seems like something needs to be added to make this singular thought more clear and flow as smoothly as the rest of the poem.
awesome poem though, i really like it a lot. so true and revealing- it's very beautiful.
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Perfection indeed, I adored this write
Hugs, Bunny
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Absolute perfection
like whispered breath
into winds of trepidation... this is a haunting line that trembles with excellence Words read like a song echoed in eternal bliss. You have grown so! I love this one.
hugs Mum
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I had a feeling you were going to enjoy this one. I have been continually challenged this year to develop my poetic skills further. thanks for your encouraging words, I shall keep on striving to expand my horizons.
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Amazing work! Such lovely flow and word choice, truly inviting to the reader. Deeply touching and so very true.
Well done.
Thank you for entering! -
So True
This is so beautifully said.And the imagery of the ink pouring slowly upon a single small drip of life in the poetic reality we all share is just amazing...Well put my friend...
Blessings
~Cheryl~
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nice win. congratulations.
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I am amazed at this...The language, the flow and the imagery all took my heart in flutter...Wow, such an exquisite piece...
Lynda
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"Words flow like streams
through unkempt forests
from quill to paper"...
so many wonderful lines in this poem,
especially the last one..
This is so awesome, a very beautiful poem, and I love the title!
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