The nostalgic moon spoke
full and shining
telling me to run
to a river flowing
awaiting return
Where a friend whispered
of scriptures old as time
encrypted beneath
under stronger currents
held deep
Like my heart sighing
with lighted secrets
open to the night
floating, following wishes
made on life’s line
Pure as your yawn
against decorated roars
smiles reciprocated trust
sweetly daring
like budding leaves
Baby but...
this hopeful breeze
freezes still, cooler
inside thoughts of sun
midnight~
28-11-07
A contest entry
- Shall You... Blossom? by LadyLavender.
575 points, ended January 31, 2008, 6 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
The piece is set on "Loy Kratong" day (night), a Thai festival held at year's end in apology for any abuse done to the Chao Praya River... here's a vdie: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J05U2oeANg8 :)
Comments
1 - 15 of 15
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I like this. Really well done. i agree with born4freedom, the last stanza...humm.
Good luck and thnak you for entering. -
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That actually is the point, because I wasn't sure myself whether I was to act on such feelings (for it's mostly my imagination). Although I know he would've liked me to just fall again head over heels... I wanted to preserve my head and heart (body?) this time... so the last stanza reflects the conflict and confusion insdide me
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A stunning piece - good luck in my contest
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thank you~
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Wow This Is More then lovely its as if you and that night were lovers and you were proposing to it... wow i really felt this and there wasnt a part i didnt like true art here
more then excellent
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Aww thankies so...
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you use the english language beautifully with that glorious eastern sensuality and simplicity of verse
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thank u!
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*Um*
I'm not really sure which emotions you were trying to prevail in this piece, but I liked it. I could really picture this poem. Thank you for your entry, and good luck!
All the best,
*Stephi* *Rose* -
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Thanx 4 the honest comment Stephi...
Think the reason you had a hard time deciphering my "emotions" is because I don't fully want to admit to them as hinted out in the last stanza~
Lol... anyway, best wishes 2 u too <3 Alex
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Beautiful thoughts!
This is lovely with beautiful language and imagery!
Lynda
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It was a beautiful night in many ways
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This is awesome!! This is my favorite poem of yours so far!!
"Pure as your yawn
Against decorated roars
Smiles reciprocated trust
Sweetly daring
Like budding leaves"
Beautiful lines throughout!!
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Thank u... this is also one of my personal favs and if I had to highlight any stanza that'd be the one chosen too ^^ you're always so right on, Tara TC... Alex
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