I'm drowning in an Ocean
An ocean of your love
You're intoxicating-ly sweet
You're taking over my soul
Sweeping me away in your tides
Your gentle foam caresses my cheek
A I sink deeper into you
No life preserver can save me
No ship can take me away
I'm committed to your depths
I'm stuck in your sand
The deepness of your heart
The beauty of you has captured
My every reason of being
You've stolen me away
Every second gets harder to breathe
And I'm deeper into you
With a kiss I'm gone
I'm forever with you
And in love with your watery
Kiss of Life-stolen and
Rewritten to be yours
From now until eternity
With a loving seaweed band
I will never make it to shore again.
Author notes
Picture number 1
A contest entry
- Cheesy Doodles by Luna Tique Fringe.
300 points, ended December 3, 2007, 5 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Anything by Norman Crabtree.
390 points, ended December 23, 2007, 46 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What's your first impresion?
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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Amazing poem !
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I'm glad you like it.
I think you've become my number one fan with all these comments.
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Wow, a whole big string of metaphors, you have some good ones.
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Thank you! ^-^
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I thought this was full of mysterious and radiant beauty! The only thing I didn't care so much for was a single line... well the word in that line:
"You're nonintoxicating-ly sweet"
I don't know why... I think it just takes the depth out of that single line... maybe it's just me... Other than that though, this was awesome! Good luck in the contest.
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Awwww so sweet and beautiful here my mermaid, the deep love, waves of a heart
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Wonderful
Very perfect for the first picture. best of luck in the contest.
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