On this special day, this holiday
I sit alone in stillness and solitude
I stare into space, seeing nothing
Eyes fixed, yet unfocussed
My mind wanders numbly
Through the shadows of my thoughts
Tension tightens my body
Misery wells up within my soul
I look longingly at your photograph
Wishing you a happy Christmas
Through my tears a smile struggles through
As a rainbow shines through raindrops
Again the return to the aura of loneliness
Memories of past Christmas mornings together
Move like a slide-show through my mind
And the tears begin once more
My heart aches for your touch today
The feel of your hands caressing my hair
To see the smile in your eyes so blue
With all of your love lingering there
Your voice telling me how much you care
The remembered aroma of aftershave
I miss your gentle kisses
And I can’t find you anywhere
Outside it is Christmas Day
In here no celebrations
I am alone, entirely on my own
In here, everything is grey
My very private sorrow
Constricts and confines me
In a prison of personal pain
Within a public celebration of joy
This is all I see
This is my reality
Author notes
This is indeed a reality every Christmas Day
A contest entry
- Dark poetry by cutekitten789.
800 points, ended December 11, 2007, 12 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
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I read this on different levels:
It's heartbreaking, yet in a way it is heartening. Sounds like you had an amazing life with this man. So while it makes me sad, while it hurts to see that loss, it offers hope to me, even through my jaded fog, that I can have something like that. Why is it that loss reminds us how much we need to have someone who means that much to us ..when losing hurts so much?
I am envious and want to know what it is to have that kind of love, despite the risk of loss..
And I am saddened by the pain you feel and express so clearly here.
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Good luck on this contest I think you have a real good chance at winning this because is is a great piece.So much love and sorrow shown in this work.Your feelings were easily understood in this and the topic was absolutly heartbreaking.You spent some time on this and it shows.Great job of expressing your feelings and God Bless
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So painfully sad!
This beautiful poem to your husband made me cry. It is a very moving write indeed and I wish i could invite you to come and spend christmas with my family, no-one should be alone on such a day, although I am sure your family make sure you are not. Take care, Julie.
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wow... thats so beautiful... i love the last two lines...they have finality to them... it tells of a death of true love... thank you for this peice...its very much what i asked for
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