Feeling cold, shivering
As tears from heaven
Remain on my chilled face
Waiting to slide down
The edge of a round surface
As angelic drops fall
From my face, to my arms
A tickling feeling is sensed
Sending shivers down my spine
Making the hair on my arms
To sick out, stand straight
Feeling so rejuvenated
Like I just came out of a shower
Moist skin and soaking hair
Clothes drenched and wrinkled
Eyes feeling so cool, refreshed
Upon seeing rain drops
Sit gently on the petals of flowers
With a slight magical touch
What a pleasure it was to run
Through a heavy downpour
But even more of a joy created
Upon Settling down after a rain
- I Truly Love The Rain group list • next in list
A contest entry
- After The Rain by SilverButterfly.
475 points, ended December 6, 2007, 10 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Write something decent by Clockwork.
375 points, ended January 3, 2008, 36 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
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wow!
I like the freshness of this piece. It is sincere and I felt it came to a good closure. I love how you describe the raindrops sliding down from your face to your arms. It gives a poetic feel to it.
The second last stanza was really refreshing. I almost felt like I was the pets, with rain falling on me.
Congrats on the HM!
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Easy to visualize these scenes described through the words in this poem. Got to love that downpour, yet the aftermath is wonderful - that freshness and scent of nature. New moisture for the soil and plants - cleanliness all over.
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Worn out phrases:
tears from heaven
just came out of a shower
shivers down my spine
hair on my arms
To sick out, stand straight
Besides that, this poem is decent. I guess it's only because I can relate to it, but only in a more severe sense
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Oh wow you've described the feeling so well!! The visualization was very real.
Thank you for entering this
SilverButterfly
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