I see the moon and the moon sees me
This peaceful feeling was meant to be
There it is up in the sky
The bold beautiful moon a site to cry
It's beauty is beyond compare
On it's glowing face it has no care
Mr. moon every night you watch over this place
With your big bright light and graceful face
I wish I could be up there
Down at the poeple I'd like to stare
Nothing would be on my mind
Mr moon you and I shall surely dine
Well it's time for me to say goodnight
As I lay on my bed please cover me with your light
Soon we'll talk again
To you my lovely night friend
Author notes
option 2-the moon
A contest entry
- I see the Moon, and the Moon sees me.. by Vera Jewel.
500 points, ended November 30, 2007, 3 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - 5 OPTION -- Prewrites allowed by Florida Sunshine.
525 points, ended July 29, 2008, 28 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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Merry meet,
Congratulations on winning an Honorable Mention. I love poems about the Moon.
Congratulations again on your win.
Amythest -
I'm not sure if you knowingly or unknowingly bordered on alliterations -- but I noticed the makings of it. The rhyme is simplistic --- but in a good way. I really feel going complex would take away the value of this kind of write.
I enjoyed reading this, you did a terrific job!
Thanks for entering the contest, it was a pleasure having the opportunity to read your work.
Best of luck to you,
Florida Sunshine
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This is a sweet poem but I think the rhyming feels a bit.. forced. Thank you for entering though and good luck.
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thats a good poem i live it and the moon is soo pretty too heres a 5 and keep writing
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