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From the Winter of our Discontent

Though silent snowflakes hush both man and mouse,
white mantle donned by garden, path and house,
helter skelter crystals soon shall melt
for seasons spin, thaw hoar in rhymed carouse.

When light returns to comfort spirit sight,
when weariness falls from enlightened wight,
the sacred Truth within you soon shall find
as sun dissolves cold snowbound oversight.

Don’t spend your life amongst the living dead,
their wanton souls just with aversion fed,
who ruminate lament their ‘unjust’ fate,
who bitter fruits of life feel lie ahead.

No longer languish, mark majestic morn
transforms each ugly duckling to swan sworn,
enlightenment admitted as clear goal
from night soul whole at last may be reborn.

In winter wonderland fresh hope uncloses
as New Year offers confidence one knows is
unshuttering for healing broken heart,
from crysalid apart true joy discloses.

Spring lungs inhale, absorbing Nature’s scent,
while winter’s sleep-weep sweeps away, scope sent
from hibernation freed, to birth new day,
through growth within spring’s blooms more represent.

Your patience is rewarded as clouds pass,
Your spirit, as transparent as clear glass,
haloes hallowed hollow hid inside,
mind sloughing off rough weight of shred sin skin.

Jack frost's cold core shall surely thaw away,
bask maskless in reflections from today
accompanying birdsong to rejoice
and celebrate an optimistic Earth …


Author notes

aaba see rhyme scheme Rubaiyat of Omar Khayyam

Background http://media.photobucket.com/image/animated%20snow/rockxbunny/sno_ani11.gif?o=13

In a list

A contest entry

Courtesy welcome and extended [Reward: double points]

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression? Line numbers
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?) (Line numbers)

Comments

1 - 9 of 9

  • LongPatrol
    August 30
    ?
    Edit | Reply
    Oh, wow.
    This is a great poem. You see, I think of winter poems like snowy, cheerful, white descriptions. Or kids playing with snow and having snowball fights and such. But this? Wow. I was completely taken off gaurd. Not in a bad way though. I'd have nothing bad to say about this poem anyway.
    You really described how you bad things shouldn't overcome your life. And about how winter will melt away by spring and the sun, does that mean that if you have a happy attitude, the bad attitude you have will slowly melt away and disappear?
    This poem is really awespiring. A great seasonal poem. And with a great lesson to be told, too!
    Good job on winning gold. You thoroughly deserved it.
    Oh, and, by the way, awesome background.
    -Long Patrol

    . Rewarded 8


  • sOuL gold member
    June 28

    Edit | Reply
    Should i write something?
    is there any scope left to write something?
    I like Rubaiyat of Omar Khayyam
    and i love what you have written, for sure this is a great poem.

    . Rewarded 4


  • meanderingbear gold member
    December 7, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Lovely!

    Beautifully penned...excellent poetry! I especially love the stanza that begins with: "In winter wonderland fresh hope uncloses"... You certainly deserve to win the gold with this most excellent entry. Congratulations!

    Carolyn


  • Tirrell
    December 5, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    ok I have read again, there are places wher you have thrashed the meter for a subtle way, though this adhears a rough spot to this poem, the unusual imagery here alows for a more high spirit of creative flow.
    Though its meaning becomes clearer, nearer the close and is deeply rewarding for any who reads this. it is a fine peice, though some of your quartrains are clearer with flow, image and meter, others are tedious, as teh meter had been thrashed aside for a more subtle melody. all and all the metaphore runs through the poem as a whole, creating and enticing intreague. Thank you so very much for entering.

  • Tirrell
    December 5, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    I do like the sounds, yet the poem is lost to me, as spelling has derailed my thoughts, please check. For there are some words I question the meaning of, like wight-- did you mean white? However I do love the immagery... I will read this again before I judge.

  • Lily otv
    November 26, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    When light returns to comfort spirit sight,
    when weariness falls from enlightened wight,
    the sacred Truth within you soon shall find
    as sun dissolves cold snowbound oversight.

    Insight is a wonderful gift and it’s a gift you own and use in so many areas throughout your poetry. This poem is a real winter tonic. Perhaps a little extra winter warmth will aid an early thaw!


  • waydownuponjoy
    November 26, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Seasonal Satisfaction!

    This poem shows not only a mastery in the use of poetic devices but shares the authenticity of real perceptions that gather within to keep us warm when the world without is preparing to surrender to those chilly winds until Springtime's reawakening. A good example of fine poetry! joy


  • Night Hope gold member
    November 26, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    "Don’t spend your life amongst the living dead,
    their wanton souls just with aversion fed,
    who ruminate lament their ‘unjust’ fate,
    who bitter fruits of life feel lie ahead.

    No longer languish, mark majestic morn
    transforms each ugly duckling to swan sworn,
    enlightenment admitted as clear goal
    from nigh soul whole at last may be reborn."

    Such incredible insight & wisdom resides within your words, dear Scribe. A beautifully penned prescription for light...& Life. Wanda

1 - 9 of 9