The Heated Exchange of Two Authors

Letter #1:

To both of you,

Quite frankly you do not understand my style. I do not adhere to genre conventions but am a "free spirit" if you will, on this conformist site. Unfortunately you all seem to be stuck inside some kind of mental barrier where you cannot escape rules and regulations. Sure they are good for peace in modern society, BUT, and this is a big but, they are poor for poetry as they come to the conclusion of constantly similar work. Which quite frankly is as dull as the proverbial ditchwater.

I wish to receive no further communication from you Mr Rannilt, if that is your real name. You have put in a series of long words and asterisks into your comment in order to try and bluff me into thinking that you are a clever man. I have a doctorate PHD in Astro Physics, I believe that I am the more knowing fool of the two of us.

Lord Espanol

Letter #2:

Lord Espanol,

Seeing as your sentence structure gives me leave to play the semantics game, I now reply to your asinine comment. Translation: My real name is not Mr. Rannilt. It is Rannilt, and I am female. Since Mr. Rannilt is not my real name, and you only wish to avoid further communication with me IF my name is Mr. Rannilt, I am able to continue communicating with you without violating your wishes. Although I will not voluntarily do so after this comment. You really should pay attention to details.

Frankly, you are an ass. I understand your style perfectly. It is immature and whiney. It does not read rules. It does not like grammar. It does not know what a cliché is. It does not understand that ‘free spirit’ is an excuse used by the lazy and the unintelligent. Good writers understand the rules they break, and do so stylistically. You just break them. Resoundingly. Badly. Like a baseball through a rose-colored stained-glass window. Or do I mean rose-colored glasses? At any rate, the colour is what is tinting your paradigm. Your “best f*cking work” was not up to the standards of this contest. I can not make English any more plain than that.

In art, rules are often broken. But only by artists. And only deliberately.

I’m sorry to have confused you with my comment. Which words went over your head? I find it hard to believe that any did, seeing as you head is so far up in the sky. The asterisks were meant to denote one point from the next. I use them to alleviate confusion, not to cause it. I do acknowledge that some heads are permanently confused, but my use of asterisks or a lack thereof will never help that.

So tell me, oh great, all-knowing fool, how did you pass your classes to get a PHD when you cannot even recognize when you have lost an argument?

You are quite right. I am not a clever man. I am a clever woman. And you are indeed a fool.

Rannilt