gleam of tarnished silver
mounted rusty stone
turquoise almost gone
age can sometimes tell
spirit of ancient stone
gleam of rustic beauty
jewelry for a maiden
all passion held within
Author notes
word count 30
A contest entry
- brevity by Melissa Gayle.
5500 points, ended November 25, 2007, 21 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
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I'm jealous of those first two lines. I'm torn about whether or not this should be punctuated, because while it'd be easier to read with punctuation, it'd kill the stream of conscious, already awesome flow. And it's your poem & thus your call. In any case, je l'aime beaucoup!
Amazingly done in only 30 words! Brevity works well here. Good luck in the contest. -
good
i loved your discription {gleam of tarnished silver
mounted rusty stone} i only wish it was longer.
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