I love her so much,
I wish she was mine,
She's beautiful and sweet,
I think of her all of the time.
I wish I could kiss her,
And hold her by me,
Thing is she doesn't love me,
But she still hold my heart and the key.
She's so flawless and perfect,
It's impossible not to stare,
I cry every night now,
My emotions all flare.
I can't stand how much I love her,
But I really, really do,
Why won't she love me back; you ask?
Because I'm a she too.
Author notes
i chose the writing promp 5, cause thats when I kinda came out to myself.
A contest entry
- Dirty Little Secret by EverxEnding.
450 points, ended December 2, 2007, 7 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - GLBTIQ options! by butchbec.
660 points, ended December 7, 2007, 6 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Golden Poems (pre-write quickie) by JM Kenyon.
450 points, ended December 22, 2007, 41 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
ugh...
Comments
1 - 10 of 10
-
love it
-
A great poem, very heartfelt and the final line throws open a whole new door of thought. Great job.
s and best wishes always... ~Genie~
-
HOLY F*** I WON GOLD!?! *colapses*
-
-
Lily you so deserved Gold
-
-
Very sweet! I know the feeling.
I love the song choice by the way. It is a great song. I can relate to your poem in the aspect of loving someone, but they don't love you back. Being a gay male myself I have encountered the same thing in the male direction, and now that I am coming out of the bi closet so to speak I have also ran into females that react the same way. People seem to just see part of me rather than the whole. I love how the words flow togehter and describe the emotions that you are feeling and trying to convey. I feel what you feel and I sympathize with you. Thanks for sharing. Good luck in the contest. -
thanks so much for entering my contest, ive been where u are, and its so hard, i hope that soon you find someone who will love you back with all her heart and soul, and i wish you much luck for the future. Thanks for writing something that i can so easily relate to, and that flows really well, the only pointer i would give you is make sure the rhyming scheme is kept the same all the way through, it will just read better,
Thanks, and goodluck!
Bec
-
u said your poems suck, but i really disagree, i love this.
-
This is a really beautiful piece you have penned her.. incredibly humbling!! Thank you for sharing it.
-
This is wonderfully written. I love the flow.
I'm sorry that she wont love you back.
That's so hard. I'm glad you could share.
best of luck in the contest
-
Good job Lily, I like how you don't see the "secret" until the ending and it connects the poem. Nice work
Adding your comment:
1 - 10 of 10
