"Hey it's me," The message says
"I know things have been rough, but maybe we can talk?"
Then there was silence as inside she screamed
'Babe I know your ignoring me
These things willnever change
You like the feeling but grow bored of me
After way too little time
Its okay though Babe,
You won't have to deal with me
I know I'm annoying,
I'll be gone soon enough though
Out of your hair for good
The permanent solution
To the temporary problem of life.
These words are my last
So goodbye.'
The unspoken words are the hardest hitting
Easily written with the blood
From her oozing wounds.
Right before she slight her wrist
Her pain gone
His suffering increased
TEN FOLD
Looking at the mess he caused,
Looking at the mess she made.
Author notes
ChristinaXCuriosity was inspired to create this poem because of someone.... "special"
*I am leaving at last a world where the heart must either break or turn to bronze.
Chamfort (1741-1794) -suicide note-
A contest entry
- Duel Option Contest by Dazed N Life.
600 points, ended December 10, 2007, 9 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - His words are like poison but his lies make you smile by edit my world..
425 points, ended December 15, 2007, 26 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - i wrote this for a boy that never loved me.... by autumns rising.
1200 points, ended January 18, 2008, 12 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Let's Do This Quick Like Bunnies by Jasmine Rayne.
310 points, ended January 30, 2008, 5 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Suicide (emo, death, sad, . . .) by DarkLotus4Life..
300 points, ended February 2, 2008, 12 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
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thithis was a good poem. I think you could have put a little more emotion in it though.
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I like your take on the quote and almost instantly knew which one you chose without even looking in the Author's Notes. Thanks for your entry. It's much appreciated. :]
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like early stated i didn't like the ending. It should have packed more of a punch, it kind of lacked surprise and emotion. however this is tstill good. thank you
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OK... this poem is great... but definitely not what it could be! You bluntly reveal that you commit suicide at the end. I think what this poem needs is more imagery and less conversation. Tell me about the pain she is feeling. Tell me more! I will give you until the end of the contest to do this... if not I will tell you now that this is not the quality Im looking for.
(p.s I'm sorry if this seems harsh but I'm being honest)
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