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To Tim


The question I always repeat,
but answers are incomplete.
I ask you over and over, why?
Yet never once have you replied.

Very soon you will be set free,
but not for what you did to me.
Is that one punishment enough?
Or is it time for me to get tough?

Never was there an escape,
from all the abuse and rape.
My emotions were so mixed,
something I am still unable to fix.

I'd do anything at all for you,
but the fists and punches flew.
Punished for what? I'm unsure,
as I heave my body from the floor.

Wondering to myself all along,
what did I do that was so wrong?
Its not me, its you, thats right!
You were always the one to fight.

My love for you was so strong,
yours in return was very wrong.
You loved power more than me
because of that we shouldn't be.

I want to be Strong and survive,
yet my love for you is still alive.
So....
I will ask you, once again, why?
Please, this time, for me, reply.

 

 

Author notes

Prompt; a letter to my abuser

Option 1

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    • Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 14 of 14

  • xxRainbowDawnxx
    April 19, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I think these questions really do need to be answered... I can relate in some ways and want to ask my ex who didn't do as much granted but did what you shouldn't, why? He just fobbed it off and I always wanted to know why he said he didn't know, that's not an answer. I NEED TO KNOW... I still need to know, as it haunts me.


  • GypsyEyes
    January 26, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    very emotional write and i loved the way you expressed yourself! great job! i wish you the best of luck in the contest!
    NineTailedFox


  • Puking Faerie Dust gold member
    December 29, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    I thought this was written very well. You used pretty good imagery, flow was great, and the rhyming was done very nicely. The only thing that drew me away from it, was that it didn't provoke any deep feelings in me. Almost like, yes, it's a sad story, but I can't feel the sadness. Great write, nonetheless.
    Thank you for entering, and good luck
    Jeanette*~


  • Atrophya
    December 25, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Oh honey, I'm really sorry. I hope you left him because you probably already know, you DONT deserve someone like that and I understand that you love him but you are too awesome of a person for that. I could probably guarantee that!!

    I'm sorry and if you're not out of this, I hope you get out of it soon. No one deserves to have power over you!! No one but yourself!!

    Please feel better. =/


  • Tarja
    November 29, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    When I was young I was violated by someone who I thought was my friend. He was five or six years older than me and I had a crush on him. Then he did bad things to me. His name was Jesse Blue. And honestly... I do not think I could ever work up the words to express my violation and my pain to him as you have here. That is very brave of you and I thank you for sharing. Good luck.


  • Dead Star--x
    November 28, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    yet my love for you is still alive-
    i dont know whats its like to still be in love with someone who did that-i know it happens and that must make it 50 times worse, but as soon as mine happened i turned all love into pure hate and disgust
    but i have met people that do love them-they have times when the person is nice and loving and they have times when that person is dark and evil..
    either way its probably best if you still want him that the conditions be that he has some sort of therapy and new rules to abide by-if hes not willing then he isnt worth it
    best of luck and thanks for entering♥
    Dead Star--x


  • Simple-Fairytale
    November 27, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    This is terribly sad...the emotions in this were so strong...and hit me hard. I'm so sorry you went though that pain and heartbreak. Hope all is well.


  • CarolDesjarlais silver member
    November 27, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Oh, dear heart, to give you his answr woudl be to have to face his own demons that have made him so controlling...it has nothing to do with lov... not even as victims is what is left love, but a need to have our preciousnesds retrieved... we get it all mixed up...we must go back and retrieve that strong, courageous bravery and purity all by ourselves.. Emotionallyw ritten piece and I do see you treading water and expect you to breast-stroke away from it.

  • Starz of Heaven gold member
    November 27, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    This is so sad I have wriiten letter like this just so i can get my feelings out.It helps sometiems thansk for sharing this with me. much love


  • CherryOnTop
    November 22, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    LadyDementi this is how it always works out. these bastards we fall in love with.They don't never know why or what. Somone ought to have an island just for abusers and let them just beat the mess out of each other untill they take their last breath.


  • PastelMoons gold member
    November 19, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    This is heart-rending
    your words are so powerful
    so poignant,
    "why" how can a simple
    question that deserves an

    answer, become so complicated..
    yet I know it is..
    Outstanding!
    Good luck in the contest!
    *hug*
    ~Pastel


  • kiwigirljacks gold member
    November 18, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Oh hunny... this is so sad!! Why is it that often we still love the people who have hurt us so much and don't deserve it!!

    This offers a very stark and real picture of what living with an abuser is like... brilliantly written... I really felt it and cringed in parts like the bit: "as I heave my body from the floor."... so vivid!!

    I love the way you have written this as questions to him... pleading for answers you may never get, but needing to understanding why!!

    I know you are away from this terrible person who abused you (right?)... and I hope writing this helps you to let go of the past...

    He did not deserve you!!! There is nothing wrong with you, I hope you have come to realise that now... you are a beautiful person who deserves to be cherished and loved.

    Great writing as always!


  • RedwingSpirit silver member
    November 18, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Awww. Lady...I can relate. And i am so sorry to hear that you have been dealt the same cards as I ..

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