from that very first kiss I knew things would change
just when I thought our bond couldnt get any stronger it did
what did you do, do you know magic?
I cant help but smile every time i see you or hear your name
*********
since the first time i looked in your eyes i never could look away
its like your pulled me in somehow
Those days in NY were one of my favorites
trying to sleep in those seats, yeah that was a feat
I'll never forget that first time
I trusted you with everything I had
the first time we were together as ONE
the feeling i had was way more than glad
Summer time was crazy and yes still filled wit drama
i gotta say i'm still relieved that im no one's baby's momma
but man were there good times like "ZOO DAY" for sure
Even though the wrath of my mom we had to endure
But i cant forget the day you had to leave
because it brought on a realization i almost could not concieve
i never thought i would have to let you go
and i guess that was when i let all my feelings for you show
But i cant wait till we can make each other our own
And we're thrown into the whirlwind of a beautiful cyclone
I'm talking about the day that your my husband and i'm your wife
Your the one i want...for the rest of my life
A contest entry
- Anything goes.. by IamRemy.
625 points, ended December 16, 2007, 29 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Love is more than a four letter word! by Unstoppable.
600 points, ended December 27, 2007, 49 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Silly Little Love Songs (again) by Wanted By You.
500 points, ended January 14, 2008, 15 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Enter All Your Love Writes Here! by xxRainbowDawnxx.
300 points, ended March 8, 2008, 306 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Pimp up my love poetry by leander.
700 points, ended February 22, 2008, 31 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Prewrite Craze Contest by BlackSwan.
550 points, ended June 29, 2008, 84 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Against All Odds, We Touched the Stars with Our Toes by PaintedParisPassion.
550 points, ended December 24, 2008, 25 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 19 of 19
-
I love how you ended this, referencing to being married and such, it was very sweet. Thanks for entering and good luck in the contest. Keep sharing and dont stop writing.
Peace and looove
B -
I love those last to lines there,
"I'm talkin about the day that ur my husband and i'm ur wife
Your the one i want...for the rest of my life"
I'm going to be honest with you though, as nice as the wording in this poem may be, it won't go anywhere in my contest until you fix your grammar miss
I would appreciate it if you did that, I wouldn't want to see such a nice poem go to waste because it was written like a text message
-GL in contest -
-
ok i fixed up some stuff i hope that it's better to your fitting now
-
-
This poem definately shows your feelings for that very special person you have met. You displayed it in a very beautiful and tender way actually.
I'm not sure about the chat-lingo you used (u and ur...) Proper spelling is actually one of my pet peeves, but that's probably because English isn't my maternal language and that I got quite confused in the beginning I saw this internet talk in English
thank you for entering the contest, I wish you the best of luck!
Leander -
I am so glad you have found someone who means that much to you that you'd want to be with this for that amount of time... sometimes, people and things can surprise us. I thought Steven and I couldn't get closer but I bet i'll be surprised.
-
very nice
very nice write on love . . liked "from that very first kiss i knew things would change" and "i trusted you with everything i had" . . nice ending as well . . insight in this piece . . good luck in the contests
-
Cute. Well done. Thanks for entering my contest!
-
The ending was really strong. Thank you for joining!
May we all be green. -
Wow Girl. Look at you go with this one. This one was awesome. So much love and emotion filled into one poem. I am definitely sure that your man must really love this poem because if it were written for me, i'd love it. lol haha But I wish yuns two the best of luck in life as it has many things to come your way Keep me posted as to how things are going.
God Bless You!!
Charles
-
AAAAAW lil bit you're in love. That's so cuuuuuute. I'm sure your dude will love this cause I like it.
-
Awww, I luv it It's very sweet, and I love that you have so much hope. Most people would go off and write angry poems and be grumpy. But you, you are one person I like. Nice job.
-
This is a Hallmark moment
This is just an amazing poem. You should have it published for a card or something. I will look forward to seeing it one day on a shelf or in a book. Anyway, good job on the word usage and the topic. Keep writing and I'll keep reading.
-
-
thanks very much
-
-
You Are So Welcome
I appreciate good poetry.
-
-
-
It started off rocky, but then it nicely flowed. I remember half of dis stuff especially NY where "nothing" was goin on. ha, but I'm glad ya'll figured it out and I betta be invited to that wedding.
-
Awe this is absolutely beautiful!
You're amazing Kaila!
"what did you do, do u know magic?"
I love those lines :]
This poem made me smile, it's so sweet <3
-
-
aww thank u kirsten this inblocked the writer's block a lil lol
-
-
Wow, that's whats up, I liked that yo'. and you'd have to look at meghans poem now to see what I wrote. But other than that I'm pretty sure, Eltee would love this, that is if you ain't got someone else puttin a smile on your face (and somwhere else). But of cours I know it's about Eltee. And I know you're not the typ to cheat so, that's all good. But other than that I like it.
-
wow kaila!! u is really gave this some real thought.....damn. big thumbs up
Adding your comment:
1 - 19 of 19
