I cannot let myself cry for you.
I want to almost every moment
when I realize how much
it hurts to be away.
In Russia, the glaring sun wore me down.
There, I cried anytime I wanted
and I didn't mind
that it watched my tears
fall in the night.
We came together last Friday
And with my face buried in your neck
My eyes welled over.
I hid my face in the dark
because parts of me are still afraid
to let you see me so fragile
to let you know that my heart spills over
in tears
of love
for you.
I did a silly thing tonight --
I read old poetry
I listened to Jewel
And I very nearly cried for you.
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