Cut 11/15/07
I cut myself the other night
For the first time in a couple months
Everything was building up inside of me
Made me feel as if I was going nuts
I'm beating myself up for this setback
Feel I'm a failure for sure
I want to end this addiction
I don't want to do it anymore
Everytime I see my legs
I get very upset
And say bad things to myself
For this, I really do regret
The pain just got too much
For me to deal with alone
The urge was also there and strong
Therfore, I didnt postpone
I felt no pain while doing it
Just relief inside of me
It didnt even last that long
But was worth it, appearently
Some people think it's for attention
Others, just have no clue
I'm here to say it's an addiction
Just something that has to be worked through
We don't cut for no reason
Nor is it attention we want
If that were true, we wouldnt try to hide
And all the scars we'd flaunt
Maybe this time I'll go much longer
Without having to self harm
Until, one day, I do it no more
That day, will be quite a charm
Author notes
Option 3: Cutting
I cut, for the 1st time in months, this past Saturday night. And have absouletely been beating myself up over it. But maybe this means that, since I went about 2 months without doing it, I'll be able to go longer next time. Who knows?
A contest entry
- OPTIONS (16+) - PW's are fine by Forever--x.
600 points, ended November 17, 2007, 37 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
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Comments
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this is a sad poem hunni
but one i understand ive been there
you have us now
much love
your little sister -
awwwwwww
You arent alone anymore princess. You have a family now in the Happy Family. You will find some sweet people in there to love you and listen to you. We all fail dear one, just get back up and keep trying. The key is getting back up and not just lying on the road. God bless you dear one, Mark
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I completely understand what u r saying here. And I feel for you. I wish I could take your pain away. Hopefully time will do that...
I'm in the same situation, hadn't cut since April 9th, 2005, that is, until last Christmas, did some not too bad cuts. And then again July 12th, did some really bad cuts. Then again close to a month ago. I don't know why I started again, after going so long. You are absolutely right when you say it's an addiction. I also call it an affliction. It's a hard thing to beat. I started when I was 15yrs oldish, I just turned 31yrs old...I should never have started again!!!
Sweetheart, take care of yourself. I'll be thinking of you, and praying for you.
~Monica
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