I threw away my virginity
when I was sixteen
to a boy I didn’t even know;
didn’t love in any small way.
threw it away because I was drunk
and couldn’t force him off me;
couldn’t make him understand
my pleading shouts of
“no. stop. please. just stop.”
he didn’t know me either,
and didn’t care to.
I was there.
he was there.
that was all.
he fucked me hard,
not knowing it was my first time
and having no desire to be gentle.
afterward, I pulled up my underwear,
rolled out of his bed,
and slipped into my pants.
relieved to be done,
grateful it was over.
hours later,
I climbed beneath my own
pink and purple sheets,
the same ones I’d had
since the fifth grade,
and wept rage into my pillow,
sobbed regret all the way
into my dreamless sleep,
wondering if what had just happened
was considered rape, and deciding
it wasn’t-- which didn’t mean
I couldn’t hate him
all the same.
three days passed
and I sat with my parents
watching the evening news
with our meals in our laps,
munching on steamed broccoli
and soggy asparagus.
he was the main story:
the tragic death of a teenage boy
killed in a house fire
while he slept.
my mother and father
gasped and shook their heads,
muttering about the cruelty of life,
asking me, as an afterthought,
if I had known him.
all I could manage was,
“no”
and then I vomited my dinner
all over the living room floor.
In a list
♥
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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This was really raw and real. It wasn't overrun with confusing metaphors or excessive imagery, but still had a great poetic touch to it. The flow was great and the ending was amazing and I can relate... the only suggestion I have is in the last line, I think you could remove "all"... I don't know, it just makes it seem exaggerated. I hope I make sense. But overall, really great poem but so sad
Jeanette*~
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it's strange how karma can be sometimes. Often, when I wish harm on someone, it happens and I do really feel guilty because I feel the cosmos actually listened to me for once.
This is sad, that you lost your virginity to someone who didn't care for you and you didn't care for, but at the end of the day, it happens and we can't turn back time.
I lost my virginity to a guy who ended up being a complete and utter fuckface...therefore, I am not happy about it either... it was earlier this year and even now, I want to wash myself of him.
Great write anyway hun, good to get it all out. -
The ending felt like a punch in the gut.
This was incredible.
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Wow. I generally don't go for such straightforward poetry but this was so very intense. It kept me there and the ending is so powerful. Love it.
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Pretty good. dont know you to know about your emotions in your poems but i do know that that was pretty damn good
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Trying out story poems? Not bad, senorita.
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Oh, that gave me chills....
What else can I say?
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