And I look through all my writing
And I try to find some of me in it
Something to say
I’m here, I’m here, here
If you look, you can find me here!
And I can’t explain to you
My inexplicable growth in semi-maturity
Or how I can say so calmly
What is making my heart skip-
Skip-flutter in my ribcage
Beating out, beating out, out-out
A fast tattoo of fear when I look in your eyes
And I see you sitting idly and I can’t help
But wish I could kiss you
That we could overlap our
Solitary universes enough to be alone
Together and it won’t happen
Because jokes are jokes and truth is truth
And I am not for you and it hurts even
If I could say it to someone else
In “maturity”
It's not the same, because it's you
But you, ha, you
You’re too busy being yourself-without-me
And my heart just keeps on tap-tap-tapping
For you, for you, you-you-you
And I look into my writing and I cannot find my heart
And I’m hating how far you are and can’t you please just
Listen?
Author notes
You won't ever read this, so I do not have to be frightened -- though I am.
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