There was once a kingdom of fairy kings and queens, they had many workers and very cool machines, the kingdom was sensational and you could not deny that every fairy there was very glad to fly. It was a lovely place, with flowers all around, there were golden statues and flowers on the ground. Everywhere that they would go they looked up and smiled, because they were playful and happy as a child. They came up with an invention of sorts, a thing that toots and whistles and makes funny snorts. The faeries tried to share it, tried have some fun, but it was a gift far better than the warm sun. So there greediness soon turned into hate and on and on it would go, until one day there was war and i don't know, they threw rocks and broken spears and they were filled with hate, and they knew that they never would have a clean slate. The war is over now. And long gone the kings and queens, for now that place is known as the land of broken wings.
Author notes
i tried the rose and it didn't work, so i put this in the authors notes, i hope that's alright.
A contest entry
- Amid the Myth (2) ~ "Innocent" Smiles by x Gemini x.
300 points, ended December 6, 2007, 5 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
How was i?
Comments
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Thank you for entering my contest.
Very classic, just like a inspiring bed-time tale. Simplistic, imaginative, and relatively short.
My main issue with this piece would be that it rhymed with no structure. It was like reading a book, but it rhymed...so there was no rhythm, or easy way to follow, since I've never seen a rhyming piece melted together in a generally non-rhyming format, if that makes any sense.
Overall, I think it was good, though.
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awesome!! I think this is one of my favs... =D It has a really cool story and rhyming technique...
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