It hurts so much
When it isn’t supposed to
I know you’re sorry
For the past you’ve once hidden
For the facts you cannot alter
The more I will myself to hear
The saccharine sins you’ve caused
The more my heart shatters
Within it’s once solid walls
The more truths you tell me
About socially permitted beauty
The less beautiful mirrors become
I don’t know how to control this
I feel like I’m going crazy
And I know it’s my fault
For feeling that I need to know
For the hatred of a flawless ‘she’
I’ve never met
And now I’m so happy
Yet I’m grieving
That I can never be pretty enough
To be approved by the people who know you
That I couldn’t have met you before
That I waste my life away
Wondering if you’ll always be mine
Instead of living with the moment
And just loving you
Author notes
just a few thoughts going through my mind tonight.
Comments are welcome...
Comments
1 - 12 of 12
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Descriptive
Saccarine-monosaccharides! Sorry, random moment of remembering biological facts. But that's a good word, especially paired with sins. It implies a lot.
"heart shatters" is a bit cliche. How about heart implodes or explodes? seems louder than shatters.
The message of this poem is a little unclear. I think it's that the narrator was living a life of lie as a beautiful paragon, but when the veil was lifted, she felt relieved at the same time sad because she lost her significant other. Or is it something else?
I think my confusion stems from the descriptions of his "saccharine sins" to blaming herself.
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hmmmm haha... well truthfully... i wrote this wen i was a lil upset .... i dint want it to have to make sense i jst wanted to feel better after writing it... its a lonnnnng story lol
... but well to cut it short the girl has low self esteem and is kinda hurt about her boyfriend hiding stuff about him nd his gorgeous ex...things that she ought to have known..nd wen she finds out she feels she has to know but doesnt really want to...
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Sad
Sad, but very nice. ^-^ I read it outloud to a tune; makes a nice song, with minor word alterations. -.-;; But, ch'yeah, I'm just weird like that.
Good, anyway, very nice.
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thank you!
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Wow this is an interesting piece. I really like it. Strong emotion and well written. Nice flow and imagery. I really enjoy reading your pieces. Keep up the good work
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thank u!
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since comments are welcome I think I'll leave one
lol sorry had to 
good job on this it was well written and really strong...talk to you soon 
-Steve- -
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lol thanx steve hope ur fyn... yeah tok to u sooooooooon!
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Wow. I totally loved this, especially "For the hatred of a flawless ‘she’/I’ve never met" which like... pulls so hard at my heart strings that I may need new ones if you write something else like this. Wow. So beautiful.
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thank u ... i'm truly glad u liked it that much...
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you have a really interesting way of saying whats on your mind.
some great ideas.
i really like your writing.
seej
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thanx seej....
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