We are small yellow suns
suspended together in space
plasmic arms entangled
in mutual relativity
Our avatars roam galaxies
seeking to see touch share
what momentary forms we
manifest in the tracts of time
remembering if but a sense
of our ancient dance
For how long have we caressed
our tandem orbits bathed
in the other's light
For how long have we warmed the face
of myriad worlds and moons spun
round the plane of our equator
Here on a rock called Earth
warmed by a kindred's rays
we have met once again
to joy in the spectral hues
we have loved an eternity
In a list
Thoughts, Feelings, Interpretations, Experience:
Comments
1 - 16 of 16
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thy words touch within that brotherhood where love dwells within the heart reguardless of what world it survives in!
Keep penning on one stroke at a time!
Bill
. Rewarded 4
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Real spacy and very intellectual and great. I love the way you 'universalize' love and make it so big, so grand.
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Hm...this is interesting. Very mysterious and raw. Seems almost paranormal in a way. I love how you incorporated astronomy into this poem. It gives a very substantial theme. I love it.
"We are small yellow suns"...
You seem to know a lot about galaxies and stars and whatnot. Curious, have you ever heard of the Star-borne or certain synchronicities? Solara, perhaps, and encoded digital messages? Just wondering.
Anywayz, nice piece.
Peace && Blesses,
~Rain
. Rewarded 8
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The last stanza is the best, wouldn't it be nice to love that way? I think you know a great deal about space which is good and you can write about it while keeping your poet's soul. Great read.
. Rewarded 4
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Astronomy
You write a lot about astronomy. I suspect the universe is infinite and eternal, that galaxies come and goo in cycles, quasars being their beginnings in local "big bangs" where two black holes (their ends) collide. -
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There are others out there: "Stardust", "Lapse", "The Intertext", "Starscape", off the top of my head. I think two of these are temporarily removed. I can put them back now with the proper publication references, so I think I'll do that soon.
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You're use of enjambment really helps the poem flow. I love the concept of us being small (insignificant) but still part of something big (the universe).
. Rewarded 4
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i've been searching for you
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love the imagery in this write. it seems very soothing to me. caressing, warm, touch / share...
beautiful work.
blessings and *stomps
. Rewarded 4
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this is very calming and mysterious. great write
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I am not sure yet
Of course this is only my opinion, but I can honestly say that I am not all that fond of this one. I love your writing, your thought process that you put in your writes, this one just leaves me feeling empty as if their was not a whole bunch of passion induced by this write.. although, for free verse it flowed well and I could clearly envision the perspective, I just did not FEEL this one... I think one of the only ones I have ever thought this of....I hope that none of this was too harsh and I did not offend you! -
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This is very curious. There is probably more passion and feeling behind this poem--for me--than for most of my poems. I wonder if your distaste comes from my use of celestial imagery mixed with a combination of astrophysical and metaphysical terms. Anyway, it's good to hear from you and to have your honest thoughts.
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Erin, Distaste is kinda strong... it would be safe to say that after reading this again, which I don't usually do, I like to rely on the first impression... I get the feeling of emptiness from pretty much exactly what you said... you know... the whole final frontier? The vast emptiness of space? I think that the background put me in that mind set... although... still not feeling that passion that comes through in almost ALL of your writes...
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Always enjoy reading your free verses.
Such soothing images, made me smile
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very well done and full of vivid imagery on the theme of personified planets and suns; wonderful phrasings and soaring words; a zen type of feel a point of view on the nature of existence...well done...PK
. Rewarded 4
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good job
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