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Skipping Stones

skipping stones
as I speak of things
I am afraid of
the way he looks
and looks at me

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1 - 5 of 5

  • haikumonk silver member
    December 23, 2007

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    The last two lines really caught me. The rhythm where L5 picks up again from L4 is wonderful. The double use of "looks" works well here also. Another fine piece.


  • duana
    November 24, 2007

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    congrats on all the poems you got publsihed. This is REALLY good. I could never be this creative! Excellent.


  • crystallynnbradford
    November 13, 2007
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    this is very good..it could really set a tone for an awesome story


  • maggiejamespoet silver member
    November 13, 2007
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    Paints a great poem and love the metaphor of "skipping stones."


  • Emerald13
    November 13, 2007

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    great pivot .... lovely story to this (in my mind) ... the open endedness allowing each their own and yet its a moment we 'know' so well (from his or her perspective) ... soo nicely done ! its the second 'looks' that makes it, for me ... >>> Gina

1 - 5 of 5