i wish you didn't hurt me
i never asked for it
you always said you loved
i'm afraid you never cared
i only stayed because you apologized
and said it would never happen again
but it only ever did, i only hurt worse
i wish i just knew why you hated me so much
for years i stood beside you
while behind closed doors you beat me
i protected what you said and did
and you kicked me when i was down
no longer can i handle
the things you do me
you only ever killed me
and now it's time to leave
A contest entry
- This is your opportunity to write about your life by only1love4ever.
758 points, ended November 27, 2007, 19 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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I'm glad that you're getting out of what sounds like a horrendous relationship.
I'm sorry that it had to happen to you, and to all the other women out there who have to deal with the pain that you have gone through.
You are a very strong person for being able to write about something so painful.
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Okay, only a couple of things first: Watch where you need to capitalize, and add punctuation, and you might want to revise a few areas to make it sound correct. One example is: No longer can i handle the things you do me" This needs a little revision!!
Otherwise the poem itself is marvelous. I can understand your point of view, although I have never been in such a relationship, thankfully. I know that it happens to women, and for that matter to a lot of us behind closed doors. I am sorry for your pain and suffering! I hope that you recover and get your life back...Best of luck to you my dear.
I would also like to thank you for entering into the contest. Good luck!! -
G'Day mate
♥
Having been stuck in an absuive 'relationship' with my ex for over 3 years I can highly highly relate to this ... I think you have penned this well and it is very deep and sad.
Best of luck in the contest
Stay safe
~Amanda
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hmmm... I do like this... I only have one qualm in this poem... the second to the last line... "you only ever killed me" I think that even though you may feel dead emotionaly, mentally, and may be even spirtually... I think that it takes away a bit of confidence from the poem... because physically you are not dead... It would be wise to re-phrase this line... otherwise great job. This really is a wonderful peice.
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