Perhaps it is the colour, which invades the orphan verse;
It breaks, and wheeling, tumbles down before me.
Whose flowered widows lay within the silent-rhythmed hearse,
Unload these paper trucks of cancered theory.
Perhaps it is the colour forced upon and inside, each
Emphatic bud; a church bell struck, uncertain
Breaths which fall in Autumn tenderness then speak
Of darkest visions held beyond the curtain.
Perhaps it is the colour, which invades the meadows pane;
Dark insects of the hollow boat house, knew
Of secrets in the wood which live on, deep in splintered frame
That burrow down to nerve and muscle-sinew.
Yet how are we to know you in the greenness of the chase,
The lamb that falls to fox before Spring’s gate?
As wake of Summer, turned to bed; a whispered prayer’s place
To dream the fall of sleep’s elusive weight.
Author notes
This is a tribute to the emotions conjured by the visceral writing, poetry, words of the great, inspirational poet Dylan Thomas. Sadly gone before his time. His work is so full of feeling that it leaps off the page in colour for me.
I hope it also evokes something of his dark, troubled, fiery Welsh spirit, his estuary landscape language of Laugharne in Wales (where at last he sleeps - he suffered from insomnia) and that you enjoy it! I began it standing in the boat house where he wrote much of his work. Something really does live on in the wood,the woods and the tumbling meadows of the place.
A contest entry
- Allpoetry Book 2: Get Published! by tinuelena.
1050 points, ended November 13, 2007, 16 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Prewrites! by aeolia.
380 points, ended January 19, 2008, 116 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - 41-45 ages enter your best prewrite Judged by RedwingSpirit.
700 points, ended January 18, 2008, 9 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - TEN THOUSAND POINTS OF RHYME (Now 20,000+) Part 9a Feelings by cricketjeff.
1500 points, ended January 29, 2008, 40 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - I by N e a r.
2300 points, ended February 3, 2008, 220 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - poetry hacks rhyme together by alaskanamber.
525 points, ended February 23, 2008, 16 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - A Poem that Changed a Life by Timothy Cameron.
700 points, ended March 19, 2008, 9 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - The endless contest (or longest contest is more like it)! by Ted E Bare.
450 points, ended April 30, 2008, 96 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 22 of 22
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nothing here is wrong
and with great flow to boot
enjoyed
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Very well done! I see why it has won so many well deserved trophys. Your rhyme is on target and your image is vivid.
Love,
Amera♥
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I agree with the imagery. And you managed to bottle what do you call it? "his estuary landscape language of Laugharne in Wales" in your language. A wonderful piece. Thanks for entering.
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What a nice tribute. I haven't read any of the work by Thomas, but nonetheless, this is magnificent. Your repetition has meaning, and it suits the poem.
Thanks for entering my contest! Good luck!
M a r l u x i a
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Yes. This does evoke some of both the feel and style of Dylan Thomas, as well as being in yours. It was a really enjoyable read and we both thank-you very much for entering it.
This was a very large round with a lot of very good poetry and Sue and I have had a great deal of fun, and some arguments in coming up with the winners. We hope you will be joining us in the finale
Jeff and Sue
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great imagery, I enjoyed this a lot.
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great work man!
wonderful stuff u have here
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Thanks my friend!
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Excellent Work This is great
Thank you for taking the time to enter into my contest.
I wish you the best of luck.
REDWINGSPIRIT
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In our perception, color is an attribute of light and light, I think, is shared with realities beyond our decaying one of forms (Plato) of matter-in-motion (Hobbs). Color, as in gemstones, will grace the shapes of things, which for us, are to come. I think intelligencies will be light-beings.
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this is beyond a tribute, these words tumble, but gracefully, even choreographed, and smoothly, the repetition and the fluid rhyme beautiful devices. Well done.
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Oh. This is a nice little poem that you have written here. It seems like you put a lot of work in to the meter and the rhythm of this poem. I read your author notes but I guess I read it differently than what you intended. I guess I didn't see it as being about a specific person but I had thought it was about human life and in death, the life of those that are left behind. I thought you did a good job of expressing yourself.
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Thank you, I'm very excited by the fact that it worked on both levels. You're right about human life and death. These are reflected in Dylan writing almost constantly, so the poem is of course about Dylan's language and the elemental nature of his vision above everything. Hence the 'grammatical' widows and orphans in the first stanza also have a more obvious meaning, which I've played on so both apply. The colour of the title is both the colour of language and of nature's arc. I'd hoped it would work without the notes (I never know quite how much to say in the author notes, it's always a conundrum!) so thanks again.
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Amazing write! The tribute seems flawless and I am greatly jealous of your writing skills! The rhyme scheme is very wel done. I love the beginning, it drags me in immedatley. Wonderful write!
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a nicely penned tribute to a great poet, I like the trouble you took to evoke some of his work (green fuse, the church bell) and you have put yourself in his space to write this, not an easy thing to do. Nice.
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I'm glad you noticed some of the references. Yes it can like playing with a double-edged sword...easy to cut your own head off.
Thank you
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ilove the imagery and flow . a fit tribute to man... thanks for sharing
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Quite fantastic, not your everyday poetry, flavor is more of older, wiser poets!!! Really lovely job on this.
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The imagery here is amazing... I can't wait to read your other poems!
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I have read a few of your pieces now, and each time my respect for your mind grows, such wonderful imagery in each piece, well penned words, emotion, thought provoking pieces...well done once again.
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absolutely wonderful poem to enjoy!
whose flowered widows lay withing the silent rhythmed
hearse...my gawd that was beautiful!!!
The whole poem is beautifully done!
Dylan Thomas himself would have smiled ear to ear!
good good job!
ears2hearyou
Kathleen/Seattle
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