read these words before you
and recognize the disbelieved truth
of this world we live in
of tragedy and sin
the other day my teacher told me
of a sad, true, discouraging story
of a little boy who died
at the age of just nine
because medical insurance he had not
he had no help when his tooth began to rot
and the infection spread to his mind
and God decided it was time
leaving his mother alone and disheartened
pining after her departed
in Lousianna these boys got in a fight
because they were hated by the kids of white
and went to jail on a make-believe trial
and the media went wild
they called racism into light
automatically making things less right
sadly this is justice in the eyes of the South
and everyone knew what it was really about
and right now a family mourns
a little redhead born
12 years ago, their little girl
who was their whole world
all she did was walk down the street to play
after school that day
but she never got to return home
and why we may never know
you want to believe this is a lie
that these happenings never happen, why?
you ignore a world of pain and broken innocence
to retain your blissful ignorance
so think back over what i've told you
these stories you wish weren't true
A contest entry
- The real World.......prewrites allowed so ENTER by trace3grls.
525 points, ended November 24, 2007, 9 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
what are you thinking?
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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Hmmmm, very good. I liked the theme of this a lot. Good luck in the contest. Well done.
Tal.
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Wow... you did a gread job of portraying how the world is so messed up. I often think like this myself, and wonder what made the world so messed up. This poem is incredible but sad.
Thanks for sharing and good luck
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i love this poem..
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BRILLIANT!!!!!
for a young person you have a good grasp on the dichotomy of humanity. We all wish to be good but unfortunately we still have to contend with bad people and bad things around us. You have captured that well. -
Sad but true, this is a good poem but your focus doesn't always need to be on rhyming. Making a poem read smooth is a quality in many poems that don't rhyme or don't always rhyme. You can rhyme as much as you want but this poem seems to be forced and choppy in the rhythm. The rhymes are great. The meter isn't all that, but the story is amazing and you did a great job writing the entire piece. A lot of hard work went into this poem. Just saying too much time was spent on rhyming than making it smooth out. The title is great and it was worked well into the last line of the poem. The opening stanza was quite an eye opener. I like how you tell the reader to think before they speak basically. Look at this world...we make it change each day. Every individual.
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So very sad to read, yet unfortunatly these are all true events in this cruel world of ours. Reading this poem makes me appreciate what I have!! Thank for a great write!
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these are so sad although true. it is a daily occurence in this world of ours.......
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