Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read Contests Groups Learn Forums Store Help
 

How many breaths

Missing image

Tenderly flowing from her most succulent of lips,

The Keeper of Storms whispers,

 “is life measured by the number of breaths you take?

  Or the moments of your life.......

  that absolutely take your breath away”

 

Dousing flames of passion,

Feeding fires of retaliation,

Next to each name a list of grudges that bare your pain

with proud disdain.

 

Kindling for bitterness, self righteous, manic depressives. 

Frustration, envy, alcohol, snort choices drowning “the voices”  

Sludge of grudge, binding, pulsing enters your veins.

 

Hate returns Hate

Injustice returns Injustice

Blinding all vision.

Causing lips to perse, curse, or worse drown in anguish n' silence.

Bitterly replacing this our most precious  of gifts..... our own fragile humanity

Holding a grudge? A lazy, futile escape at best.

 

Tasting my tears,

She draws me near,

Sighs in my ear….

 

“the depth of your past is an indication

of the height of your future,”

recognize this, give power to your future,

give power to your mistakes. 

A vibrant energy seeks to renew, restore,

rebuild.

Teach you, sculpt you focused directives, even a goal.

How can you listen if grudge speaks through your Voice?

Grinds you, seeing ony disgrace not courage or strength?
 

I stutter, restlessly  stammer…

“how?..... dear goddess do I…..”

Interrupted by wild whipping winds tossing me mercilessly,

She spoke,

“forgive,

let it alone,

leave it behind,

let it go,

lay it aside.

Give no more power or energy to “it.”

 

“is life measured by the number of breaths you take

 Or the moments of  your life that absolutely.... take your breath away”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Author notes

Emptying my inner backpack...I don't want to walk into
the new year with sludge. I am wrestling to forgive
another of much pain they have caused in our lives.

A contest entry

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 15 of 15

  • Angelflower
    March 25, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Oh I hope it worked for you!! this piece was great.. the emotion in it was amazing.. I love it!
    Great write.
    Peace to you, Jetleena


  • just a voice
    November 27, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    HOLY SHIT! That was an awesome poem! The imagery was brilliant. Dang you are a hell of a poet. I just loved this. I read it twice in a row. Great job.


  • Voximation
    November 26, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    This is a good piece, i enjoyed it. Although I liked the lighter piece better. It has more of a persuasive feel to it.Words are a very powerful and underestimated tool. I like writing because it makes me feel like i am at least trying to impac the world. Through the internet knowledge can be very contagious, and i hope to get the word out.


  • Bruised.Roses
    November 20, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    I can't see anything that needs changing the most is perhaps the structure but even that is great....I loved these lines:

    Dousing flames of passion,
    Feeding fires of retaliation,

    It sounds so much like something that would spill from my own pen....amazing work you have created here I see the talen that burn within you keep writting
    xxx-Tash


  • SerenityNChains gold member
    November 19, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    A wonderful entry quite beautifully penned. The flow was great, as was the wording. Bravvo poet!

    Blessed be,
    Billie Jean


  • parachute fog
    November 18, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    this is captivating, im taken to another world with this peice. I dont know what to say that will give it justice..so i will just stop here haha


  • Breathing-Fate
    November 18, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Wow ok this took my breath away lol i absolutely luv it u r incredible i hope u rub off on me sister poet i luv u so much u rock best blessings + giggles --your sister poet fate


  • Ephiphany
    November 14, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Wow, sis...this is full of emotions that pour out on this piece. Great job and I love that phto chosen for this.

    ephiphany


  • SpydurPoet gold member
    November 14, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Ahh. I have read painful outpours about your daughter before, it seems. This is so intense and heartfelt. I hope that everything heals itself.

    Write on.
    ~*~SP~*~
    P.S. Are you feeling better yet?? No more pneumonia?


  • shattered mirror
    November 12, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Tells a story which flows and is beautiful


  • Endeavor gold member
    November 12, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Excellent


    the depth of your past is an indication
    of the height of your future,”
    recognize this, give power to your future.
    A vibrant energy seeks to renew, restore,
    rebuild.

    There are some wonderfull truths in this
    Your skill in words is increasing

    Very well done

    Rick


  • Marctheman
    November 12, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Love this piece, great style, great flow, enjoy reading it.


  • Denierim
    November 12, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    I like the style you write in in pieces like this. They're true and well worded, telling a story that goes beyond the words read on the computer screen or a piece of paper. They're filled with emotions that carry you to a place away from your own. Such truth in your words that can only be told by the truest of hearts.

    Wonderful work with this one!


  • Poetic Tasha Moderators member
    November 12, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    AWE amazing write. you definately have an identifiable style that is all your own. i like that.

    I don't understand Corrupts comment of "setting your pace to grow at the rate of others" ha. that makes no sense, you are your own person and will grow and respond at your own natural pace. We all deal in our own way, good for you being able to express your feelings,

    this speaks many things. Thanks for sharing with us.

    L'il sis
    Tasha


  • Menace
    November 11, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    So how many arguments with your daughter are really in this? I see you growing...but slower than you think. It's magnified in your writing and your art is becoming more detailed. My critique is simple. This was very, very good. My advice is stronger. Don't let details be your downfall. Set your pace to grow at the rate of others, slowing to respond to the moment.

1 - 15 of 15