I don't need you

Family angers me so much
I can hardly take it
I want to yell and scream
I'm being judged by you who love "god"
Well how can you love your god that says everyones equal
And judge me at the same time
I hate your looks of disgust and your patronizing words
I am my own person and I DO NOT live by your rules
I live by my own morals and regulations
I stoped all the things killing me with out your help
I can take care of myself I've done it fine so far
You say I need you to live 
why would I need people who hate everything I do and say?
I've taken care of myself thus far
I've made mistakes yes,but who doesn't
I forgot how to tell the truth
I lied to him that I love
I almost died
I almost lost my purity
And for what?
I lied because I was sick of the pain
I punished the one I love because I couldn't handle the thought I might loose him
I almost died because I gave into peer pressure
I almost lost my purity because I though if he didn't love me then why bother saving it
I relized all my mistakes and my fucked up logic
I'm trying to fix all the hurt and pain I caused
I want people to stop fucking with my mind
I want this family to love me for ME
I'm tired of wanting to impress you for nothing
I'm tired of faking my happiness in front of you just so you wont worry
I will love myself eventually
I will forget all the pain I have locked in my heart
I WILL get better
but I'm sick of thinking that I need you when you don't know me
I don't need you
I need the one who loves me and all others can just go away
I love him with all my heart
I will never hurt him again
I will go against society itself just for his love
I will ignore all my friends who say they hate him
They don't know him
I know him
I know he is a good person
I hope he will love me forever
I hope someday he will be able to forgive me for the sins I made
But I'm done with this family
Because I don't need you.