Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read Contests Groups Learn Forums Store Help
 

planning my abduction

 
 
 
 
 
in the future,

I'm an alien time-traveller.
 
I abduct myself without remorse

and play the cold clinical creature.

 

incapable of recognising common
genetic ancestry

I visit dead years,

probe anal recesses,

push through all the shit and blood
of life.

 

I examine strange

shiny fabrics

and music that baffles sense

in smoky rooms

lit by bright flashing

lights in the sky ...
 
I beam myself up.
 
One of me is small,
grey and frail; a withered
clock;
a balding compass,

shrunken in its skin

with large

almond eyes;

 

the other me is young,

more recognisably human.

 

Each questions the other

for days

                          [ some things never change ]

 

and accept the same replies:

 

       both of us lack answers

       and understand little,

       hold to a hope of something

       while poised at the edge of nothingness
       at diametric ends.

 


 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

  

In a list

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think (Critical Honesty Appreciated)

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression? Line numbers
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?) (Line numbers)

Comments

1 - 7 of 7

  • Starswhispers silver member
    November 28, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Love the wonderful metaphors and imagery in this most amazing write. Thank you so much for your entry.


  • Suzanne Dia gold member
    November 11, 2007

    Edit | Reply


    there are moments in my life when it feels as if someone has abducted the sweet me, sent her off to lick her wounds, usually self inflicted, i might add. and this strange creature that holds me in those alien moments, well, while i don't recognize..and often don't even like her ... she saves me when i need it.


  • Tirrell
    November 10, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    The line I like and take away from this is " I visit dead years", not sure as to why, I just like the sound of it. As for the poem it is nice, and contemplative.
    Well done.


  • dehydrated
    November 10, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    brilliant kate. it felt like you are satirizing your "todays" and describing a future which is a bitter resultant of your life. something you wish or something that you know will be there.

    i loved it!


  • ArtFullyMe gold member
    November 10, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Interesting take on the quote...
    and that first line works so well against/with it.. because if you think about it ...it doubles back...

    It doesn't really seem to matter how much we know time doesn't tarry, our minds do.. over and over again, which is what I get from this.. a sense of looking forward and backwards at the same time.. not stuck, but stuck...

    am I making any sense? lol... probably not..


  • Naridill gold member
    November 10, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    This made me sad. Possibilities and more, you definitely capture so much more than what is visual to the eye. It stings but it's effective. Beautifully poetic, as are you.

1 - 7 of 7