vines
tearing my already
fragmented heart
oh how it bleeds…
the haemorrhage from
swallowed stems
the broken vase
shams like a poltergeist
piercing unstroked
skin
the fertilized water
reflects your face, so
unhealthy, my tears
poison images
&
from this bloodshed
from blistered feet
to hasting minds
I turn red
I think I miss you,
but from the pain
these roses cause me
its too hard to
read even my
own emotions…
A contest entry
- Picture Inspiration #9 by Laura Lamarca.
550 points, ended November 16, 2007, 13 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Shoot.
Comments
1 - 9 of 9
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a bit of fun...
do you mind? I heard a rhyme when I read this part:
from this bloodshed
from blistered feet
to hasting minds
I turn red
I heard:
from this bloodshed
from blistered feet
to hasting minds
I turn, retreat
very cool lines!
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Thanks - I liked that. I shall decide what to put in
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Wow!
Impressive poem! Very understandable and elegant wording! Nicely crafted and very very well written.
Moving!!!
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Thank-you for your kind comments....glad that you enjoyed!
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'I think I miss you,
but from the pain
these roses cause me
its quite too hard to
read even my
own emotions…'
those words to me were SO powerful and painfully honest... like i was being pricked with a few thorns as i read them... questioning my feelings because i am too deeply involved in the pain of it all... GREAT job!
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wow, thanks glad you liked it so much
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I don't like the picture...is distracts
from the upfrontness of your words!
I really like this, though I feel like
the ending stanza could use some work
"its quite too hard to" sounds funny to me.
Though my favorite part is:
i think i miss you
The questioning of your own thoughts is
so intreging! peace to all ~flight
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Ya, I agree... I'll try to work on the ending some *starts brainstorming*
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awww a most unpleasant write of uncertainty, for sure.
blood on the peddle seems to be going someplace or directyion. success in the contest
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