I am left
all alone,
singing parts of
blue love
(I grew a rose
and watched it unfold)
with aid of dust,
sunshine and rain,
petals they burst
into existence
I inhaled its
ardent aroma,
its fragance
so sweet
It was magic
to watch it mature,
with love and care,
it became my companion
My dearest friend,
your beauty as radiant
as any sun, shining
through my soul
My sweet rose
was so lovely
and rare,oh,
every gardeners envy !
I protected her development
through days and nights,
yet, one day,the storm came
storming through
He loved my sweet rose,
he was jealous,
and he took my exquisite flower
away from me
And she, she
was too weak,
she did not survive
his brutal force
(I grew a rose
and watched it die)
And now I am left
all alone,
singing parts of
blue love, yet again
A contest entry
- metaphor! metaphor! metaphor! I've been very literal, lately by ellipsist.
433 points, ended November 15, 2007, 14 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
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I know this all too well,
I remember how I felt
when my parents divorced...
it totally ripped me apart..
I liked it

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metaphor abounds throughout...
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Beautiful
I was touched by the way your poem tells a story. A story of contrast that begins with the joy of new birth and how it blossoms under tender love and care into something very precious and beautiful and ends with the pain of loss.
On the face of it the imagery seems to be all about the tending of a rose by a gardner, that grows to full beauty only to be destroyed by a storm. I think that it is perhaps more tale of a destroyed love?
I like the way the first line tells of loss, then you tell your story, ending with a final verse which is similar to the first. Something so beautiful comes to life, is nurtured, then is killed. I think your two bracketed contrasting couplets add to the power of contrast in your poem.
It's written in a free style and on first reading seems clear and simple in it's delicacy but after further readings appears more complex with depth of feeling.
Congrats! It was lovely to read. Hope you do well with it.
korculablue

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Thanks for the time you took to read and comment my work
Indeed, you are right !
I wrote this poem after my parents divorced
I watched them grow and nuture their love and I was a fruit of their harvest, their love
But it all came crashing down unexpectedly
It was a tale of destroyed love....to me, their love was a guiding light..something that I wanted to pursue ....and to see how something so tender and precious end like this really hurt
Thanks again....I am glad you enjoyed the read
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