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Colorful Indifference

A sabers thrust upon a chest
colorful indifference
what a mess

Kindness stricken from your grasp
your ugly words discriminate
still living in the past

Retched creations so morbid a sin
horrid words in these times
we must be men

Tears have fallen for so very long
making yourself the victim when

your the one thats wrong



Author notes

Prompt:Racism

A contest entry

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    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
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Comments

1 - 8 of 8

  • penman gold member
    February 1, 2008
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    Excellent

    Very creative and wonderfully worded. Congratulations on the honorable mention.


  • Stardust-luvr
    November 18, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    great job for your words speak loudly in the discrimination of ppl and not just in race for your words also speak of the sinister treatments of ppl's thinkings of betterment over others. well done and many loving blessings always xxx


  • Desire gold member
    November 7, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Wow!!

    Powerful piece and Magnificent take on the prompt Sweet Soul

    This gets the reader to thinking hard and for those who have experienced discrimination...
    a reminder of how times have changed...
    but...
    there are still glimpses of racism throughout
    society...

    Thank You for sharing Your Talent my Friend!
    Keep that quill dancing
    Best wishes to You in the contest!!
    Many blessings too
    and much love~ Desire~*~


  • delightfulmess silver member
    November 7, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    OH THIS IS PERFECT TAKE ON THE PROMPT
    it.
    That ending is a clencher. Muah

    Love you

    Delila

  • Starz of Heaven gold member
    November 7, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    This is a very nice take on the prompt thank you for sharing this with me.Goodluck to you in the contest.Best wishes and much love


  • TwilightDazzles
    November 7, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Okay, thank you for the clarification and I apologize for my confusion lol, it's been a long day Thank you for your entry and I wish you the best in the contest!


  • TwilightDazzles
    November 7, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    I like this, but in the end I get confused
    "Tears have fallen for so very long
    making yourself the victim when
    your the one thats wrong"

    I am not sure what your saying here, if you are saying the ones discriminated against are wrong, or if the dicriminators are wrong, I hope you mean the discriminators. Please send me an IM to clarify, I may just be reading way too far between the lines. Thanks!!

1 - 8 of 8