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amends

lately
my coffee's been weak
same pot and roast

amount of scoops
yet when I add cream
it is so pale

I wonder
how is it when nothing
changes something does

someone once told me
move
forward or backward
nothing
stands still

I look beyond
my kitchen window
transformation haunts
as green turns to amber

I crave change

not the kind
that robs your breath
or control
makes you weak

like leaping 
from romance's hot
air balloon

heart in throat


or a phone call
confirming your fear
you have lost
someone
or really
anything

no, in this world
where mothers
of sons
worry and wonder
why the war

where vacation
and security
level orange
coexist

just
something
subtle

 

like

grind my beans

make a more

concentrated brew

 

and not wish

I were the leaf

floating wistfully

 

in truth

it is dancing

to its' demise

 

 

 

 

 

 



 

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 57 of 57

  • melphleg gold member
    April 6

    Edit | Reply
    My dear, you can take the simplest thought, the slight trigger of a small change in the taste of coffee and say something so profound with such deep meaning.
    There is a bit of tension in this piece both wanting change and dreading it. Isn't that how life is? We want difference that will make things better, but we also dread the change or the risk of loss.
    In your writings there appears this theme that trial changes you for good. This piece conveys that too. It shows your strength of character to endure painful change and hardship. Even when you are grieving, hurting and wanting control. You know better and remind yourself of the truth that this too will work for good.

    • michellemybelle gold member
      April 6
      Edit | Reply
      bob, you found one of my favorite poems by me. You read into this very well, got the meaning I was going for. Thank you for reading so closely.
      blessings,
      Michelle

  • Ryno
    March 9

    Edit | Reply
    Stunning write. What awes me the most about it is how I can relate so much to it. The littlest changes in my life can make me so much more happier

    Like, getting a new computer desk chair, changing my brand of juice, etc. They all really get to me and I don't know why.

    This piece contradicts itself in the middle, by saying no big changes, I want life the same yet I want it to constantly be different. Cool way of showing your confusion.

    Very well penned. Thanks for the entry.

    Ryan

    • michellemybelle gold member
      March 9
      Edit | Reply
      thank you for your thoughtful and insightful reading and comment! Happiness is a constand revolving door, especially when we look outside for it. I so appreciate the silver, what an honor.
      blessings,
      Michelle

  • billyd1012
    February 29

    Edit | Reply
    I love your writing, but I think you would leap for the hot air balloon and you would like things that make you feel weak and you would like feeling absolutely out of control..Just a feeling.


    • michellemybelle gold member
      February 29
      Edit | Reply
      lol
      you are getting to know me quickly
      I wrote this at a time of grief and needed to feel in control for just a moment, from that hot air balloon.
      Pleased you like my writing so well.
      Michelle

  • CherryOnTop
    January 17

    Edit | Reply
    Simply marvelous. I love reading your work.Your poeticness is amazing. As well as thought provoking....

  • davidwright silver member
    December 16, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    A fine piece of work thoughtful and introspective. A great line like "when nothing changes something does" can stand on its own as a classic. Thanks for the read

    • michellemybelle gold member
      January 17
      Edit | Reply
      David, I just realized I hadn't answered the comments on this poem, so sorry! Thank you for reading and commenting and finding this introspective, as that was what I was going for, glad I did it!
      blessings,
      Michelle

  • Mark Rickerby gold member
    December 9, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Brilliant

    I like the way you tied in something so simple (the coffee) to something so profound (your own mortality). Profound and intelligent but accessible, the way all good poetry should be.

    I hope you're having a good weekend. Nice to read you again.

    Mark

    • michellemybelle gold member
      January 17
      Edit | Reply
      Mark, I just realized I hadn't answered the comments on this poem, sorry! Thank you for saying this is brilliant! I so appreciate you reading and always being so possitive, it is a pleasure. Hope your 2008 is going wonderfully so far.
      blessings,
      Michelle

  • vici377
    December 4, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    wow

    you articulated your life philosophy extremely well and made it into a WOW..your use of the line breaks to further emphasize your write makes it even more intriguing..absolutely love the ending..can see why it is one of Trista's favorites...awesome write...best of luck in the contest..

    . Rewarded 6


    • michellemybelle gold member
      January 17
      Edit | Reply
      I just realized I hadn't answered comments on this. I thank you for reading and your thoughtful comment.
      blessings,
      Michelle
  • carole21
    December 4, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    wistful

    nice write on change and feelings . . like "transformation haunts" and "floating wistfully" . . good luck in the contest as well !

    . Rewarded 4

  • juno0404
    December 4, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Captivating. Funny how the mind wanders, ask
    questions,find answers; and then questions those answers while enjoying a simple cup of hot coffee.
    Wow,,,,,,,,

  • Jalalbel gold member
    December 4, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    To sit and ponder over coffee early in the morning before dawn, I find this to be the best times to reflect on life and speak with God. The silence is peaceful. The silence is God.
    May He keep blessing you and your poetic pen.
    Judy

    . Rewarded 4


  • Jaspar
    December 4, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Woah.

    I think I'm gonna have to add you to my favorites now. XD I love how you've written about something as wild as 'change' by using things that seem so mundane as a leaf or coffee. It's lovely, and you can totally tell that you have a certain style to your writing, one that I really enjoy. It seems 'breathy', if that makes any sense whatsoever. x.x I describe thigns oddly at times.

    Anyway, keep writing because I'm greedy and want to read more. x

  • Li snuffles
    December 4, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    I really like this poem.. ilike how you speak about your coffee at the beginning.. then go on to speak about life and wanting change then you bring it back to the 'brew'-> nice technique keeping your reader interested

    thank you for entering the contest

    • michellemybelle gold member
      December 4, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you for your thorough comment, I wrote this after a poetry workshop and was trying something new, I am so glad you liked it.

  • trista gold member
    November 12, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Hi Michelle,

    I'm very sorry it's taken me so long to get back to this. After almost 4 full days of contest judging, I am way overdue for some enjoyment reading.

    Honestly...this is not usually one of my favorite formats of poetry. I think my mind relies too much on capped letters or at least punctuation, to guide me through the poet's thoughts. This is one of the extremely rare times I felt it worked though. It makes for a "wandering" quality that I enjoyed. It feels introspective and melancholy, both of which I can relate to.

    Your opening lines especially make me think of how life sometimes seems to lose its color and "taste". I've had it happen after the death of a loved one, or when I've been really depressed. Nothing changes, yet my perceptions are dulled and it just takes MORE of everything to achieve the same feelings, tastes, and enjoyment from life. Usually though, it is mostly a reaction to stress for me, and I hope that is not where this came from, for you.

    You have an excellent balance of "show" and "tell"...images and thoughts blended perfectly. There is only one thing you may want to change; "it's" in the last line, should be "its". (No apostrophe needed to show ownership of "demise".) Your word choices are excellent, not "showy" and yet each lends power to the message.

    That last stanzas also hit me hard...

    "and not wish
    I were the leaf
    floating wistfully

    in truth
    it is dancing
    to it's demise"

    I don't know the personal meaning that has to you, but to me it is a statement of the self-destructive course we sometimes wish to follow in life, even knowing it is the worst thing for us. There is something very compelling about it.

    The depth of this write could easily be missed without a careful reading, one reason I didn't want to comment until I had the time to devote to it that I knew it deserved. You've done a wonderful job with this, and the more times I read it, the more I love it.

    Love and s
    ~J.


    • michellemybelle gold member
      November 12, 2007

      Edit | Reply
      Wow! Thanks Trista for your in depth and thoughtful comment, I know what a busy poet you have been. This is about balance of dreaming, wanting and reality...like the ending...wanting to be light and floating, like the leaf...but in truth, when it hits the ground, it's life is over. Your comment has actually made me look deeper into my words, so I thank you for that. Thank you for saying I did a wonderful job on this, this is very differant for me,so I am looking for honest feedback and I KNOW you give that, and I so appreciate it. Thanks for spending so much time on this!
      blessings and love,
      Michelle

      • trista gold member
        November 12, 2007

        Edit | Reply
        Michelle...

        Thank you for letting me know YOUR meaning of the poem. It gives me yet another way in which to read it, and enjoy it.

        Much love,
        ~J.

  • jo-el
    November 9, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    love how you start off with somethin so mundane as a cup of coffee in the mornin somethin most folks can identify with right from the jump. and then it goes into those free range thoughts that hop and skip just about anywhere while sippin, starin at nothin in particular or out the window or stretching and yawnin...or like here where you've changed your morning environment for a change of pace, scenery and taste. wow..all of these lines are very thought provoking and easy to embrace. favorite lines here: I look beyond
    my kitchen window
    transformation haunts
    as green turns to amber

    I crave change

    not the kind
    that robs your breath
    or control
    makes you weak

    like leaping
    into romance's hot
    air balloon
    that last part is without eqaul. but the message clear and sensible. we all need a little variety. and yet you worked in some really big issue within the simplicity. well done. another excellent write


    • michellemybelle gold member
      December 4, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Hi Jo'el,
      I realized I never answered your comment here. Thank you for seeing my thoughts so clearly on this, as you always do. I finally have an ending I am pleased with.
      hope all is well with you
      blessings,
      Michelle

  • MidnightPoet545
    November 8, 2007
    Edit | Reply

    Very Well Written.

    Loved the imagery,great piece of work.


    • michellemybelle gold member
      November 9, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      thank you for reading and saying this is a great peace of work.
      blessings,
      Michelle
  • twilight explorer
    November 8, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Good Write;
    Definatly a great hard hitting home-slide connection to the reader.
    Congrats.

    • michellemybelle gold member
      November 8, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      thanks for reading and your kind comment. I appreciate the congrats.
      blessings,
      Michelle
  • allena1966
    November 8, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    sounds like I could be listening to some everyday blahs coupled with a realization of how uncertain times are. Good wrote.

    . Rewarded 4


    • michellemybelle gold member
      November 8, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      thanks for reading so closely...kind of puts things in perspective doesn't it. (the times vs. everyday blahs)
      blessings,
      Michelle

  • PerfectTonight
    November 8, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Great Write!

    I really enjoyed your thoughts. This piece is one I can really relate to...definitely one of my favorites so far...

    Like this one-
    "or a phone call
    confirming your fear
    you have lost
    someone
    or really
    anything"

    and-

    "where vacation
    and security
    level orange
    coexist"

    Can't wait to read more...

    . Rewarded 6


    • michellemybelle gold member
      November 8, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you for you thoughtful and thorough comment. I am glad you related so well and enjoyed this.
      blessings,
      Michelle
  • Bob Fox
    November 8, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Excellent

    To sit a ponder over coffee or whatever. To hope for change. though it my by subtle. Or even greater possibilties. Yesteday was my day for those thoughts


    • michellemybelle gold member
      November 8, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Hi Bob, thank you, my friend, for saying this is excellent. Yes, in this world, today, sometimes having the decision being...changing coffee, is a blessing...if we wish for change, be careful what we wish for.
      blessings,
      Michelle
  • loving life
    November 8, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Very good! i love this peice.


  • yourhot21
    November 7, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Great job! This had great imagery and a wonderful meaning to it!


    • michellemybelle gold member
      November 8, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you for reading and for saying great imagery and meaning.
      blessings,
      Michelle

  • Jillybean128
    November 7, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Supurb:)

    This piece flows so well. It created some amazing pictures in my mind. You have chosen your words very well.

    where vacation
    and security
    level orange
    coexist

    These are some of my favorite lines because it is such a common place in our world anymore, that we don't even think about it so see the irony in it. Congrats on a strong and powerful write!

    ~Jillybean128

    . Rewarded 6


    • michellemybelle gold member
      November 8, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you for your comment and for relating so well. Yes, isn't it ironic that we go on vacation and see security level orange and don't think anything about it now. Anyways, thanks for saying this is a strong and powerful write!
      blessings,
      Michelle
  • Astral Flare
    November 7, 2007
    Edit | Reply

    Wow!

    I'm impressed! What a poem! I enjoyed how it all flowed so nicely. It was perfect.


    • michellemybelle gold member
      November 7, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      thank you for reading and your kind comment, I am glad you enjoyed it.
      blessings,
      Michelle

  • azlyn gold member
    November 7, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    WONDERFUL!!! This is my favorite write of yours so far. These words speak clearly to me...ever so clearly! Damn...this is rich and wonderful and you made me feel so much with this verse. BRAVO!!!

    Love~
    Suzan


    • michellemybelle gold member
      November 7, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Hi Suzan,
      I am thrilled to get your comment and see your excitement from reading this...I'll be honest, I am really happy with this piece. Thank you, I so appreciate your feedback, as I respect you as a writer and person.
      blessings,
      Michelle

  • sunshinegirl
    November 7, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Sis,

    You know, I used to drink my coffee black, then when I got pregnant with my second son, couldn't drink it all. After having him, I went back to my coffee, but had to add cream and sugar... Some changes we can control, and others we can't. And well you know, I kinda like it that way...Keeps the fun in life...

    and love

    Nyetta

    . Rewarded 6

  • karabi
    November 7, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    INCOMPARABLE

    Best example to show how great poetry can be written in ordinary colloquial language. It is so easy-flowing and effortless. To read it again and again I have saved it. Only very rarely one comes across such a work which is almost perfect to a fault.

    . Rewarded 4


    • michellemybelle gold member
      November 7, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      what a comment, thank you! I am glad you liked this so well, thank you for reading.
      blessings,
      Michelle
      • karabi
        November 7, 2007
        Edit | Reply
        I am very sparing in my comments and those made on your wonderful poem were not to earn points nor to flatter you. You richly deserve them. I must thank you for sharing.

  • RedwingSpirit silver member
    November 7, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Excellent piece of work sometimes my coffee seems pale. Keep up the excellent work i enjoyed reading this

    • michellemybelle gold member
      November 7, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      thank you for reading and your comment, glad you enjoyed this
      blessings,
      Michelle

  • Anguas-Confusion gold member
    November 7, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Coffee is awesome but you find yourself adding less and less milk and making it black!! Things change in life whether it be your coffee or the day you are living. Thanks for sharing this poem, it's a good poem, keep up the good writes. xXx

    • michellemybelle gold member
      November 7, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      thanks for reading and your comment....yes many changes are out of our control, making something like a change in coffee...nice.
      blessings,
      Michelle

  • snowbird600
    November 7, 2007
    Edit | Reply

    WOW!

    A poem of many features. Very cool!!! I like it a lot! Cheers!


    • michellemybelle gold member
      November 7, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      thanks Stef, glad you like it. don't you wish sometimes the only change you had to deal with was something like...coffee! I am sure in a time like this you do, so...here's to you!

  • Devils Reject
    November 7, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    i adore this piece. you did an excellent job here. i myself have thought the same thing about coffee lol well almost anyhow. anyway, great write

    . Rewarded 4


    • michellemybelle gold member
      November 7, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      thank you for reading and your kind comment...all this started with what has happend to my coffee...lol
      I am glad you liked this.
      blessings,
      Michelle
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