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Blood, Glass and Apples. A FairyTale : Chapter One

                         
        No one believed me when I told them about her. They thought I was insane. Mind you, not insane enough to excuse me from trail and send me to hang, but insane nonetheless. It is too late to worry of all of that now.  It is deemed I shall hang, and hang I shall.
I don’t know if this will ever be seen, or if after I swing they shall search this stone cell high and low for the one thing that would expose her. I know she is scared of the truth being known. If this is found it will be her undoing, and I will cackle in hell as she is torn limb from limb. This is my only solace.
Enough of this blathering, you shall hear the true tale of this virginal queen, this battered princess, this Snow White.

                                      ***

I never knew the first queen. I knew that she was beautiful, but also barren. She could produce no livable seed of the king. She had four pregnancies, two of which fell from her womb before they could live, and the third was a malformed beast which had to be dashed against the stone, just to cast its soul from the pain of its life.
        I have asked the ladies-in-waiting where she went that night when she conceived her fourth, the princess, but none could answer me with much assurance.  Some had told me that she had eaten a rosebud and prayed to the stars. Others said that she walked to a clearing in the woods and pleaded to the Lord to give her a child. I have heard the whisperings of the chamber maids, though, that she forsake the Lord, and called upon Lucifer himself, with the sacrifice of her own blood, to seed her. I do have sympathy for her, considering that the King was beginning to become impatient with her, and there were rumors of him wanting to cast her out of his house and search for another who could produce an heir.
        Whatever happened, the Queen soon became quick with child, and all was forgiven by her husband. The King was indeed joyful, but I believe her Highness might have known that something full of evil was growing inside of her.
        As each day passed she grew more weary and listless. As her belly grew, as her breasts filled; her face became gaunt, her skin pallid.
        Now, it has been said that she died during the birth, but this is not so. I spoke with the old court midwife before she passed away from what was then deemed “a wasting disease”. She told me of the night that the princess was born:
       
        “The night was calm and still, and even though ‘twas mid-winter, we were all sweating, because we were all so sure this was going to be another twisted abomination like the last.
        “Her Highness was tossing and moaning. She was scratching at herself whispering, ‘Oh Lord, forgive me…forgive me…I just wanted one to love.’
        “We looked at each other, trying so much to hide our own fear. Then the blood came. It was so much blood. I looked between her legs and I saw the head. It was covered with such thick black hair. When I saw that I sighed a little with relief because this was at least normal.
        “As we calmed her, and coaxed her into her pushing, her voice became louder, no longer moaning but screaming incoherent nonsense that none of us could understand.
        “I was keeping my eye on the child, making sure she was not twisted within the womb, or twisted in form. She was sliding so gracefully out, with such ease, that I could not believe she was coming from the same woman who could not hold child without disaster.
        “The blood was still pouring out of her Highness, and I was sure that she would not survive to even see her child that she so wanted.  The child’s head passed through, as well as the shoulders. When I looked down her eyes were open. They were back as coal, which startled me because both king and queen are of fair completion.
          “The child then reached her hands up as I cradled her head to ease the passing of the rest of her. I saw her nails they were long and covered with the ragged flesh of the womb she just escaped. I was shocked and almost dropped the tiny princess, but just then the Queen gave her final push. I caught the princess and quickly placed her to her mother’s breast.
          “The Queen, who had passed out after her last efforts, immediately awoke screaming. I did not know what was wrong, and so I tried to calm her Highness. As I looked down to see if there was something wrong with the child, I saw blood trickling down from her Highness’ bosom. I backed away in horror, not knowing what to do. The other maids had their hands over their faces, crying the name of the Lord.
          “The Queen stared at her daughter, hypnotized, as if drugged. The child was suckling with such fervor. I had to choke back the bile climbing up my throat.
“Finally when there was nothing left for the child to taste, she immediately lain her head down on her dead mother’s neck and slept.”
        I asked the midwife why the child was not killed immediately, she answered, “The King came in as the noises died away, and the second he saw the princess he was instantly enchanted by her. We were too dumbfounded to even speak as he sent us away to mourn his wife, and celebrate his one perfect child.”

So the little princess was born in blood, and lives long enough to bathe in mine.
                                      ***

Author notes

This is the first story I have written in about four years. I hope you like it, but please feel free to critque. I am always open to suggestion, especially grammar and spelling.

A contest entry

please tell me what you think, what i can improve

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    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
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Comments

1 - 6 of 6

  • leander Moderators member
    December 1, 2007

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    I wasn't actually expecting to find stories in this contest, but now that I'm at it, I might as well read it

    Some suggestions I'd like to give:

    Paragraph 1:
    Line1: they thought (that) I was insane -> I would remove the word 'that'

    Paragraph 2:
    Line1: grammatical oopsie -> I know that she was... know should be in past tense too if I'm not mistaken.

    and that's all I could find - probably not the best reference though since English isn't my maternal, but anyway

    This is quite a good story that you've written here. Great imagery and there's this good suspence in it

    Thank you for entering the contest - I wish you the best of luck!
    Leander


  • Je Suis Prete
    November 7, 2007

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    Sounds like the beginning of a story that I could definitely continue to follow. You've captivated me with this intriguing and somewhat gruesome start. Can't wait to read more. There are a few spelling mistakes and words where they shouldn't be. "..Highness might have know 'hat' something.." also "..her belly grew 'her', as her brests.." That's all that I noticed though.
    Sara


    • harajukuprincess
      November 7, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you for eading and thank you for pointing out my mistakes. I hate grammar and spelling mistakes and it is hard for me to see them in my own work. Thanks so much!


  • sora.
    November 7, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    i love this! is there more of it on the way? =]


    • harajukuprincess
      November 7, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      most definitely, i figured I would do it in chapters rather than post a huge story all at once. Thanks for the feedback though. I was kind of nervous about posting a story!

1 - 6 of 6