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Night Cauldron

The moon has been spitting

a bit of itself

into the cauldron of the night.

 

Yesterday,

we were watching the constellations

and tonight, galaxies gaze 

 

while in the light of a crescent smile,

fog slowly simmers

around the night cauldron

and love is being made.

Author notes

Hi Tyler.....Udit here. I know I've been a part of the TI before, but my style has changed completely. A lot of my recent poems haven't been put up on Allpoetry so you're in for a bit of a surprise when you see how drastically my poems have changed. lol
btw, my new username is Raazi.

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 10 of 10

  • Tangled Angle
    January 1, 2008
    Edit | Reply

    256

    [out of 10]
    originality: 9
    creativity: 7
    Catchy Title: 6
    Transitions: 7

    [out of 15]
    Line-breaking: 15
    (Balance of) ideas: 13
    Length: 13

    [out of 20]
    Structure/Coherency: 15
    Interesting opening: 18
    Effective ending: 14
    Universal Theme: 20
    Flow: 20
    Focus: 20
    Passion/Emotion: 10 just didnt feel this. the image and metaphor was nice though.

    [out of 25]
    Message: 25
    Initial impact: 20
    Final impact: 22

    [out of 300]
    TOTAL: 256


  • Tangled Angle
    December 19, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Hello,
    Congratulations, you have made the first cut. I will be making a second cut. In order for you to have a chance at making it past the next cut is to apply for this group. Please look for the information that is required for you to give me, so that you can join; don’t worry, it is only two things: username and gender. This will help me organize making cuts better. Thank you.
    Again, congratulations, and good luck.

    http://allpoetry.com/group/info/Teen%20Idol%207?stay=1

  • Tangled Angle
    December 16, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Hey Udit. How've you been?

    This was a profound poem. Loved it. Good luck to you in the auditions.


  • Rowan gold member
    November 9, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Now... this one, I really like. More deserving, of a win.


  • Turtledove
    November 9, 2007
    Edit | Reply

    good work

    A fine entry. Thanks.

  • Miss Kristy
    November 8, 2007
    Edit | Reply

    awwwww!!

    This really creates a beautiful picture.
    it is really amazing
    good luck!
    x x x


  • Desire gold member
    November 6, 2007
    Edit | Reply

    Wow!!

    Love this piece penned and the images that come through
    especially the light of a crescent smile
    Oh Heck...the last stanza grabs
    Loved the entire piece~~ but don't want to be a spammer

    Powerful in verse
    Thank You for sharing Your Talent!!
    Many blessings to You in the contest Sweet One
    Best wishes too
    and much love~ Desire~*~


  • grannyeri gold member
    November 6, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Liked the imagery in these lines, theflow and the brevity of the lines as well. Title takes one in and poem keeps us there. Good alliteration as well.

  • secretpoet19
    November 6, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Beautiful use of words..

  • AAA Taurus The Bull gold member
    November 6, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Good poetry

    expressive and Powerful love the emotional dimension, a visual journey.. It is full of imagery and very great wording. The noon a smile was a joy to read and to review. God bless. Thanks for sharing with us.

1 - 10 of 10