the cold steel blade glides down his vein,
the blood pours out but he feels no pain
he faces the wall with a melancholy stare,
contemplating his life of pain and despair
why is he tortured by these unseen demons,
attacking at random for unknown reasons
standing his ground, refusing to fall,
times of light and warmth he try's to recall
so now in desperation he takes his own life,
releasing himself through the blade of his knife
A contest entry
- Don't go to the light, when you can have more fun in the Dark! by luna-midnight.
875 points, ended November 19, 2007, 32 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Piss Me Off, Make Me Laugh, Poems that get bashed, etc. by twilight seduction.
1200 points, ended December 1, 2007, 16 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Dark Lullabys by Redrusty66.
390 points, ended March 15, 2008, 16 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Enter All Your Dark Writes Here (Series - II) by xxRainbowDawnxx.
1500 points, ended March 27, 2008, 95 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
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Whoa
Very very dark indeed. This is like an anti-Dustin
.
sad face. Still, it's perfection as per usual. Damn it.
Love
Hannah
x x x

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good job an im loving the background
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very dark, and very unlike you.
but still awesome in every right.
well done -
Wow...I don't like dark stuff much...but you'd understand why I'm too happy and all that jazz. I've noticed you have a vendetta against capital letters in your titles >.< Anyway...apart from the dark factor this was good. The rhyme worked well, as always with you. You make it look so effortless. Evil lol.


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WOW you have described me! aww what a sad and emotional piece very moving and heartbreaking, powerful in it's texture of words so talented and the flow was perfect
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u turn words into images. its a nice piece!
images -
This really is a tear-jerker. Beautiful and in such a simple statement you say more than many can.

rebelpoet -
An intense piece, made some impressive dark imagery. Powerfully penned, love the background.
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This must be very traumatising... I like the way you worked this, for a short piece it has eerie factor and the background just adds to the 'hellish' feel.
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Short and sweet, powerful vocabulary brought about instant imagery. Good work!
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I really think your background is what's fitting my contest here.
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Excellent
Excellent write...Quite an impact with so few words... :-)
(oh, check line 5, you have a typo) :-)

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First of all, I have to say that
you have some of the creepiest background images I've ever seen!!! Talk about nightmares! LOL.
As for the poem, I love it. I know these feelings all too well (don't we all though?).
This hit home particularly hard now, as a friend of mine committed suicide just last week.
For anyone reading this that is considering suicide, as both a person with suicidal tendencies and a survivor of a suicide victim - I think I have a right to tell you DON'T DO IT! You have no idea how it will affect people - not just those closest to you, but all the other people in the world that you never even realized you made such a difference for. Everyone matters. Everyone has a purpose. Everyone means the world to at least one person. Remember that.
I'm sorry but I had to share that.
I really like your insight into this experience. Well done, Dustin.

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nice poem, it is short and simple but i love how it comes together and flow!!!
the background is distracting though, but you you can still see the poem which is the important part!!
excellent write!
thanks for your entry and good luck
stephanie =]
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