It’s a rustle in the breeze
One smile that she sees
It’s the way she flips her hair
Sweetness in the air
It’s the way she runs away scared
When she knows you actually cared
It’s the way she smiles at me
When no one else can see
It’s the way she hates her mom
That makes her somewhat calm
It’s the way she seems aloof
When her feelings are through the roof
It’s the way she yells fuck you
And laughs when it’s true
It’s the heat in her eyes
Every time she cries
It’s the way she wishes them dead
The want to put a gun to her head
It’s the way she won’t do it
A murder she won’t commit
It’s her toughness on the outside
Her self respect and pride
It’s the way she pulls through
When there’s nothing else to do
It’s the way she needs protection
And a lot of extra affection
It’s the way she moves, ungraceful
To some disgraceful
It’s the beauty that I see
When we disagree
Which brings me back to her smile
That makes it all worthwhile
It’s the cliché stars in my eyes
When these feelings rise
It’s the lusciousness of lips
And the slight shake of hips
A contest entry
- Rhyme to My Heart by WayWithWords.
525 points, ended November 7, 2007, 12 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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O wow babe!
I really love this! This is such an awesome write! It is so full of emotion and love! I just love it! You did so god babe! I really wish knew who it was about!
This is so good babe!
Awesome write!
Love ya,
Your wife,
Chrissi
P.S. you get 3 clappys
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Wow your words were written with such meaning. I agree with Ex-hick on the line "It's the way she yells..." that line just kind of stands out and had strong force, I like the comparison to all you've written. Great job
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Lovely. I love this, my dear. Especially this stanza:
"It’s the way she yells fuck you
And laughs when it’s true
It’s the heat in her eyes
Every time she cries"
Gawd, do I know that sentiment. Lulz...great job. *slap hands*
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First, I have to say that you come in on a great angle as far as titles go. I cant describe it but to say it sets it up...its the whole poem in a nut shell. As far as I know, not an easy task. I find it's almost a talent on to it self. I always feel i need a second person to title the poem, cause im never really happy with most of them, so hats off to that. as far as the body of the work..I would use the words ...engaging...interesting....even kinda sexy....
It's the way she moves,
ungraceful,
to some,
disgraceful.
This was a most interesting, very Walt Whitman. BRAVO!
BLESSINGS ALWAYS,
LOWELL POE
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I liked it
I enjoyed this poem, I think the way you describe her as being so contradictory makes this poem more interesting.
It's a really beautiful description.
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ewmahgod
i love this
its sooooooooooooooo pretty
and verrry good
♥ -
it's rhyme and flow are good, but i find this almost depressing, but then you try to make it happy at the end, and i guess it didn't do it for me. I think it's well written, just not what i'm looking for.
Thanks for entering though!
WWW* -
Ooooo!
Its a pretty poem! YAY!
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