Just a cigarette stain that
Refuses to lift
My fingertips are yellowed
My teeth
Could probably be whiter
Also
And when you kiss me
It's like an ashtray
That empties itself in to my mouth
And the taste does not fade
Ever
I could tell you, I suppose
What a mint would mean to me
Not all the time
Just now and again
If you don't mind
But stubborn stains
Are a product of a stubborn source
And I don't believe you'd listen, anyway
Just a cigarette stain
Covering an unblemished surface
Always left clean by the last person
Who kissed me, and held me
Like you do, now
(Only when you do it
It doesn't mean as much)
I'm always looking over someone's shoulder
Searching for the next best thing
To keep me entertained
For a while.
Author notes
Eh just some thoughts
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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Nice- though not your most impressive work ever.
I really enjoyed the third stanza. Had a lot of relatable truths to it, but more eloquently put than most can present it.
The ending also, was powerful and an easily recognized commonground between people.
The man I've been in love with for two years moved to Mexico and my bags are always packed and ready to leave. Hopefully one day I'll get to. - Point of telling you that is mostly to relate in the relationship troubles.
Yeah, I guess it's becoming apparent I liked the relatability and just global-ability this poem had.
-Allura

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Well I know how that feels. I did the same. In exactly the same kind of comparing of thoughts. At random times of the morning. x take care.
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I like this. In a way it doesn't actually make sense but it has some very stong feelings. Keep writing and never give up.
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ahhhh i'll explain it better
i just broke up with my boyf of a year and a half and i've been hooking up with this other guy, mostly to kill time
but he always tastes like a bloody ashtray and i hate it and i keep comparing him to my ex
*nods*
that's the 3am version of my thoughts haha
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