perdemos los ojos en las arenas sin sueño
de la tierra de desperdicio; la ceguera del espacio
nos encuentra aquí, dónde estiramos debajo un sol seco
que bebe del desierto.
es idóneo, amor, idóneo que el desierte me lame
con la arena como si fuese la sal final de una
caravana perdida que no busca nada, o también
tú, solo, alarga al cielo, lamentando la brisa,
y yo, sola, alarga para oir la tierra desvelada
antes que ella me trague entera.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
we lose our eyes in the sleepless sands of the wasteland;
the blindness of space finds us here, where we strain beneath
a thirsty sun that drinks from the desert.
it’s fitting, love, fitting that the desert licks me with sand as if i
were the last salt in a stray caravan that looks for nothing, or
you, alone, straining to the sky, lamenting the wind,
and i, alone, straining to hear the wakeful earth
before she swallows me whole.
Author notes
This is resubmitted for a contest. The original is here-- http://allpoetry.com/poem/3504714. Kindly ignore this otherwise.
A contest entry
- for truly talented poets and those who desire to be better by a gothic romance.
475 points, ended November 8, 2007, 22 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
...
Comments
-
Tried the Spanish. But, of course, I understood very little. But hey, I think my pronunciation's pretty good. Loved the use of desert and sun here.
-
Wow. I like...totally loved this one. I mean, first it's foreign and stuff, and then it's like...American. The images and sand metaphor were way cool. Totally loved it.
-
wow, this is some awesome stuff. i dont think iveread anything like this before. and you say your stuff sucks, id have to say your one of the more talented writers ive seen, coz youve got you own special style. great work 3 lots of applause for you
-
wow. i just love it. i really like how you have both spanish and english versions on here. i am surprised that this piece turned out so well in both languages.
i don't know what to say.
you could try things like experimenting with structure and form in the future.
but i wouldn't change a thing to this piece.
thank you for entering
Adding your comment:
