I
I am back
to the same place
to find peace
on the river’s shore,
where sand whispers
under my feet's touch,
where willow’s silent shadow dances
over an old and rotten boat
touching it softly
like a mother fondling her child.
Oh, be silent...
it is taking a rest
alongside old, wet bark,
dreaming of journeys
and waves past time,
keeping and hiding inside the dark chest
a heron's nest
and my memories.
Between the prow's leaking boards
I can hear
the river's lullaby.
II
Whistling,
audacious sparrow swoops,
revealing dazzling white underbelly,
and lands on whimsical willow tree
with pliant and pleasant boughs
falling towards forever’s luster,
incessantly melodic like music
in my ears but only meant
for my heart.
Enraptured by the music of water drifting along,
and living in the moment of sublime surrender,
I wished there were some way to confine
what feelings I felt within, nor could I reveal them:
tears of joy welled in my eyes, but never poured;
happiness lay itself out to tan, but couldn’t;
and my soul couldn’t construe my lack of words,
so I marveled at the fact I was lost
in a moment worth a million words
but unable to utter one.
Author notes
First part of poem labeled with number I was written by Sonja and II by PhantomsEcho.
Prompt for this poem was:
"Now, on the road to freedom, I was pausing for a moment near Temuco and could hear the voice of the water that had taught me to sing." - Pablo Neruda.
In a list
A contest entry
- Invite Only - 18 scribes of excellence - collaborations by Namita.
800 points, ended November 26, 2007, 4 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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wonderful work here by each writer, blended so very well and simply beautiful, congratulations on your award...PK
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Such tender liens to awaken water to mother's care...beautifully done... adn the voices, distinct yet so speak to how we see things from different perspectives and yet, the same... deep and dear. congratulations.
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Alliterations here are pulchritudinous. Just this is breathtaking work! It flows like water... it speaks like water... this just is absolutely beautiful.
~Namita
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This is beautiful... it murmurs like water and laps so gently against the senses. You two did a great job in harmonizing your voices here until it became one fresh stream of beauty and serenity and water-music. Beautiful work!
~ Nicolette
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This is such a beautiful collab, a nice blending of voices here...beautiful imagery
"where willow’s silent shadow dances
over an old and rotten boat
touching it softly
like a mother fondling her child. "
I love this part, I love being in places of nature that take words away
(and breath!)
A very beautiful poem that describes the feeling of this well!
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OH YOU TWO DID A wonderful job on this, thank you for sharing and good luck with your contests...MM
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EVER SO BEAUTIFUL!!!!!!!!
I often also have had this beautiful experience where the wonderous sights before me have entered my heart and touched my soul but my mind could not find the right words to describe just how wonderful this beauty made me feel.
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