I walk along the gilded razors edge
torn amongst the living and the dead
between this plain and the next
i see the nexus of either side.
I cannot choose wich one would be better
to see the ones i loved or the ones that i once did
both sides call my name and yet i cant decide
one miss step and i fall to a side
wich one is the right
wich one is the wrong.
i see ahead and i see behind
but all that is their are the tides
of ebbs and flows of other lives
they may never have a chance to be
in this position
i see the blood on the razors edge of those that have come before me
some fall to life some fall to death
its almost time to choose
both sides pulling me
i take a quick breath and i let go
i fall to the side wich wants me more
i see my destination and it makes me sad
for i am.
A contest entry
- OPTIONS (16+) - PW's are fine by Page Deleted..
600 points, ended November 17, 2007, 37 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - A Forest of words by this is a war.
600 points, ended November 20, 2007, 22 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - It's up to you by Marctheman.
700 points, ended November 26, 2007, 62 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
-
Pun intended?
Did you try to make a pun between “I see” and the “tide” (sea)??? As a metaphor, the sea represents your unconscious and your transition between your unconscious and conscious. It also often represents your emotions. Maybe unintentionally, you wrote a pun on your understanding and perception of a situation, ("I see") or perhaps there is something you need to "see" more clearly. My feeling is that your words indicate a need to reassure yourself … of something. That may take a while to figure out. But I sense you are doing a fine job with the important stuff of life. Warm regards, Sultan

-
it makes me sad
ur really good at poetry and it makes me angry. =]] i like this poem but at the same time i dont like it because i dont want u to feel this way.
[[i so found you!]]


