With a memory that lasts twenty four hours
you'd expect nothing to be exchanged
with a world ever changing
and nothing constant
new beginnings each day
or each twenty-four hour interval
there has to be some implanted
inbreded
information
some amount fo logic that lets the baby fish
know not to talk to strangers
and that let the fish
all the fish
know
to eat the chips
at the top
of
the bowl
A contest entry
- the language of fish by Cat.
500 points, ended November 1, 2007, 19 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
-
Hmm interesting line breaks here, I think a little punctuation could add to the flow of the piece. I love your idea though and your take on the prompt!! Very well thought out and I like the subtle alliteration "implated imbreded information" Best wishes in the contest
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I like your idea of instinctive knowledge to 'not talk to strangers' and 'eat the chips at the top'! Line 8, possibly you meant 'inbred'?
Does make me wonder, what are the implications if a goldfish can remember longer than I can?? Enjoyed your thoughts.
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fish go with chips.. it's naturally delicious- the background color was horrible to read/ i had to highlight just to try(for future contest reference)
best to you
m -
this hurts my eyes
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