I have come to realize,
that I am the sole cause
of my own demise.
I sit alone in a room
day in and day out.
Filling my self with sadness and gloom.
I don't live, I just exist
and that is slowly killing me.
But I want depression, I can't resist.
I need to start living,
I don't want to die young.
No longer must I be afraid of giving.
I have come to ponder,
what real happiness is like
and long to experience it, not just wonder.
I want to like who I am
and not to hate looking in the mirror.
I want someone in my life to give a damn.
The way I live is unforgivable
Only I can set my world in motion.
Only I can make my life livable.
I have the power to turn my life back on.
I just need to quit being stubborn.
I have just realized, I'm not alone.
Author notes
Sister?
A contest entry
- Straight From The Heart by Bas.
450 points, ended November 13, 2007, 39 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Be ready for real CRITICISM........ by algoressister.
500 points, ended November 11, 2007, 27 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Finally AJ looking for an AP family by Gogetalife.
300 points, ended November 2, 2007, 8 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - A Reason to Care by Hypocritical Oath.
850 points, ended November 6, 2007, 11 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - PIF - Take your life off of "Pause", it's time to press "Play" by Touchof1der.
600 points, ended November 9, 2007, 8 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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The way I live is unforgivable
Only I can set my world in motion.
Only I can make my life livable.
Those are some great thoughts for one to keep in mind at all times. This is a fabulous piece and you did an excellent job! Nice use of words as well. Thank you for sharing your words with me and best wishes to you in the contest. Keep that quill dipped in ink and ever ready for use.
♥ Touchof1der -
Wow
A lovely read, well done there! Also a lovely write, though I guess to make it a lovely read it goes without saying...I can certainly say I feel so much like that poem describes, the best example would be
"I don't live, I just exist
and that is slowly killing me.
But I want depression, I can't resist."
It's sad, but in a way, I do want it, as much as I don't want it. It's become part of me now.
Well done, and good luck.
PS, it may be from a previous entry, though why in the authors notes does it say "sister?" if it's nothing to do with this contest, fair enough, it just had me curious that's all.
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woah...you sum me up in this thing.
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This is interesting......I came back and my critique was gone, was it never here, or did you delete it?
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This is interesting in a sad sort of way!!!! It expresses a feeling of many, but only few will admit to it!!!!!!!! I sometimes misspell words on purpose, is that what you did here with the word "soul" instead of "sole"?
Sometimes I do this for a added message or impact!!!! Poetry is a way of releasing many built up horrors in ourselves and not always simply to give pleasure to the reader!!!!!!! I hope it worked in this case!!!! Best wishes in the contest!! -
how about a therapist?
someone to talk about all this. When you are just talking to yourself, it gets quite boring and, I can assure you, it's not very helpful.
Try it. And good luck on those contest entries.
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sad
i can almost feel your pain here and how you are trying to just live and get by but theres always another day to try , thank you for sharing -
second to las stanza you have two my's
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