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Life Cut Short

Those used to be my steps,
Walked them everyday.
Life was life and I liked it.
Nothing horrible happened
Until that night.
You were my love,
So I thought,
Than I saw it.
The weapon that would end my life.
A BAM and then dark.

Author notes

Uh, yeah. Don't know why I thought this when i saw the picture, but I did. Hope you didn't mind it.

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

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Comments


  • HeavenScent4U
    November 7, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    I didn't mind it at all. as a matter of fact, i found it quite interesting that you got what you wrote from that picture lol

    The only problem I had with this is something I have been running into so much and it drives me insane because it messes with some really good poetry and I know it is just a personal thing. just like I use lack of caps in my poetry, you use them to start every line and that for me stops the flow of an otherwise wonderful poem. as you read this, you want to read it as every line is a new sentence because it starts with a capital letter and that just causes a roadblock for me. thanks for entering and good luck. be well and be blessed


  • Pianokidd
    October 31, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Whoa.....


  • HerbalGoat
    October 30, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    I can see how this came from the picture provided. Sometimes, thinking dark is the best source of emotion and feeling in poetry. You did great with this. I like that you did not actually describe what was in the picture and rather what happened. Great job.