Shadows of The Cacti by Raazi at All poetry

When your reflection breaks

you look into the shards of the mirror

and say- this was your weakness, not

mine.

But when your shadow shatters,

trying to rip itself

from your being; distance itself

from your essence,

do you not feel ashamed

of using young blood to paint

the golden sand dunes scarlet,

where long shadows are born

and killed, as even the shadows of

the cacti tremble?

A contest entry

Shattered by Touchof1der. 500 points, ended November 2, 2007, 13 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Can we be serious for a moment? by sanch011. 600 points, ended November 17, 2007, 14 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Support Our Troops by Frodofan. 450 points, ended November 20, 2007, 14 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest

Please tell me what you think

Comments

1 - 6 of 6

By me, right now

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Frodofan
November 10, 2007
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Thanks for entering.

Wasn't exactly sure who this poem is written to. The contest is to write something for our troops. This seems to be directed at the people in charge, more than the troops. And if it IS directed at the troops, I can't understand it.
sanch011
November 9, 2007

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It sometimes seems young men are used as tools to the failed policy of old men and yet the blood running in the battle field never touches the souls of their feet. Very nice poem.
sultan
November 8, 2007

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There is a shame …
... but I think it comes from acknowledging the sorry state of the human condition; a condition the necessitates war. There is also a certain nobility about standing to the death against those who get their people to fly planes into buildings, strap suicide bombs onto their children and cut heads off people for saying things they don’t like. Warm regards, Sultan
Yvette Champ
November 5, 2007
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The poet proves via penmanship that words paint pictures,the language used is philosophical so that the reader is not ranted at but afforded the ability to assimilate and absorb it's intent by the carriage and deportment of it's content.A thought provoking piece,not pensive but punchy,bravo.
Touchof1der
November 2, 2007
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Your poetry flows seamlessly leaving the readers eyes to feast on the fullness of your creativity that is carried gracefully across the page here. Thank you for sharing your words with me and best wishes to you in the contest. Keep that quill dipped in ink and ever ready for use.
♥ Touchof1der
DogFish
October 29, 2007
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earthshaking!