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Rubberbands And Hair-dye

Such a gift you were,
Seemingly lost in your dreams
Smiling, torn from with-in
I could see it,
you filled your hair with mistakes
and rubber-bands and hair dye
Standing there, weeping,
crying for the death of me.
Shaking hands at God,
trying to let it go,
let it fall away, and wither
Like your passion for remorse,
and the wavering sky.
Remembering the day we met
Pushing me forward to fly
Catching my fall, as I fail
Reading to me your stories,
laughing, learning and loving,
The long walks by the shore.
I still remember your scent,
your mones, the taste of you.
O, what a woman you are, you were,
you'll always be that woman to me.

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 8 of 8
  • Aww this was very beautiful
    and stemming from the heart.
    A very inspirational poem,
    and a treasure to have
    read


  • ThatONEweirdChick
    December 26, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Like a person below me, I was also going to ask did you mean 'mones' to be 'moans'. Anyway, there's a lot of good imagery in this, and I have the worst imagination ever. So you know it's good, thanks for entering!


  • GypsyEyes
    December 25, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    amazing flow and a very emotional write! great poem and i wish you good luck in my twin's contest. Merry Christmas!
    ~Dommi


  • trista gold member
    November 25, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    I found some really unique and wonderful lines in your poem that I loved...

    "you filled your hair with mistakes"
    and
    "Pushing me forward to fly"
    being a couple of my favorites. There is a wealth of imagery here too, and it brings out the emotion and sense of loss and something else I can't quite define.

    A lovely tribute to a woman who obviously touched you deeply. Thank you for sharing this in the contest, and good luck to you.

    Best wishes,
    ~J.
    P.S. In the 3d to last line, did you mean "mones" to be "moans"?


  • michellemybelle gold member
    November 2, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    this is lovely, the images and the way you express your emotion is fresh and clear. Very touching, good luck in this contest.
    blessings,
    Michelle


  • Dragons Lady
    October 30, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    A lovely poem if a bit sad somewhat poignant. To let go of someone loved is not easy. Remembering the good times and the way they were. I love this write. Wonderful imagery. Good luck in the contest.


  • Manda Kathryn Greeters member
    October 27, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    G'day Angel

    Stunning write. Powerful.
    Gorgeous flow and imagery

    Best of luck in the contest
    Stay safe
    ~Amanda


  • AshliiAsphyxiation
    October 27, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    wow. great write.
    the flow is awesome.
    xx
    good luck in the contest and blessed be.

1 - 8 of 8