Maybe, someday, when I’m not defective, I’ll be what you wanted me to be,
Oh, wait, I forgot, I always whack my head on the bar you placed for me.
Is it because my head is too big or my heels much too high?
I don’t know, I’m so tired, and I still can’t get any shut-eye.
The years pass by, and no one knows, but would they even really care?
I stare in the mirror, confused by this mask, the image a nightmare,
But I lose the thought; wander into another reality, another trap.
And the thread tying me to society just becomes and larger and larger gap.
Is everyone like this, struggling to feel hope, or is it me, singular, unique?
In every corner, every pill container, and every heart I try to find what I seek,
Yet I leave everywhere empty handed, empty eyed, just a repeat of yesterday.
But maybe, just maybe, if I eat tiny amounts, I’ll come back with a prize and feel gourmet.
But I know it won’t work, and I won’t even try, because tomorrow is better,
And I can’t start today, I’m just too tired; I’m already dank, I’m getting wetter and wetter.
These years go by, alternately fast and slow, but I can look forward to a month or two of normalcy,
And it doesn’t matter, because my memories of happiness just get more and more blurry.
Author notes
I suffer from Dysthymia...
Look it up.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dysthymic
A contest entry
- Condemned Minds by Acidanthra.
600 points, ended October 29, 2007, 16 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Turn those greenies to Gold (or silver or bronze) by whispernthedark.
440 points, ended February 2, 2008, 41 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
